“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us…” -Joseph Campbell
As we travel through this month and the holiday season, and any celebrations that we join together as a family there is a silence where death has stumbled into our lives. Stumbled because some are unexpected while others are simply unbelievable.
It is these moments where we have to rise up. Our hearts shatter and we crumble at the moment a loved one is no longer visible. We just cannot fathom life without them. We grieve, cry and mourn that they are gone in sporadic episodes of deep longing. Many have even grieved a loss for years.
“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart…” – Helen Keller
I always wonder why we do not remember the life they have lived? Some lives can be abusive in many forms, filled with regret and addictions but we loved them – did we not? The memories of yesterday can be filled with a smile at the mention of their name today if we search through to the end result and discover the love we felt for them yesterday. It is in acknowledging our pain with love that lets our loved one rest in peace.
Losing a child has to be the hardest no matter how old we are; parents, spouses, family members, friends, pets and people who traveled through our lives are gone, and we fill with pain. We are told this is the cycle of life but it hurts unbearably.
I believe there is a reason for everything that happens in life. During challenging times I choose to wonder what the reason could be for this happening in my life? What is the lesson for me? No one can control when life moves on, we can only choose how we react to our loss. The veil is right in front of us; so close but yet so far it seems. Out of sight is the greatest of pain we experience as a society.
“The best preparation for tomorrow is doing your best today…” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
I have read about the contracts we create with each other and how with free will we can genuinely make a difference of our time here.
Can it be we choose …
- dis-ease, suicide, car accidents, terrorist attacks and other forms of despair to learn from?
- To learn the lessons of forgiveness, endurance, and acceptance.
- I imagine we all struggle with our choices; how we loved; how we acted as mother or father to our children.
- What we mean to say and forgot to mention or do for another. The regrets we carry so deep that we grieve them as well.
- If I could have, would have, or should have said this, done that circles our minds when we live through the death of a loved one.
- What about our own defensive choices we use to survive in life.
- It’s always about how we choose to think, speak, and act towards one another on a daily basis that creates memories of love or fear.
Life is the journey we get to travel daily and I, at times, ache for that moment that has slipped away. I try to recapture a word or smile even the essence of a loved one’s voice that has moved on. I believe in eternity and that we shall be together one day. Still, my heart fills with sadness that clings to me to see, hear, and touch the many that are gone.
The holiday season can bring love into our hearts as well as sadness. We can be sprinkled with the essence of an ache that takes our breath away by the experiences of death. Yet, it is said that life is eternal and our loved one lives on.
“It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light…” -Aristotle
I have survived these changes in my life by believing in simple rituals that last a lifetime…
- Power of prayer
- Energy healing
- Basking in the beauty of Mother Nature
- Soaking in a scented bath of essential oils
- A clean organic super foods and super herbs diet
Please understand and try to connect to the angels, ascended masters, spirit guides, elemental beings and loved ones that are with you daily. We are never alone. Close your eyes and see them. Ask for a visit in the form of a dream from your loved one. The signs can be many; music, license plate numbers, pennies from Heaven, a fragrant smell, flowers, even the smell of cigarettes from a loved one is a visit for you to embrace.
Believe that anything is possible and it is. Treasure the memories that fill you with emotions of the life a loved one lived with you and smile. Learn to celebrate their unique and exquisite life.
“My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style….” -Maya Angelou
It is the ego that wants to touch, see and hear a physical person so we grieve our loss as they rest in peace. Sometimes our grief can sweep us away for a very long time.
There are only two paths in life to travel. Remember it is fear that roars the ego-self that wants what we no longer have. Love comes from our God-self which knows that we have not lost anything as eternal beings of light.
Pray. Meditate. Journal.