THE MEMORY OF HER HANDS

 

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“Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage…” – Lao Tzu

I am amazed at the thoughts and images that pop into my mind since the passing of my mom. It is shattering to realize the truth of death, the final vision of the person I loved. It is three months the day after Mother’s Day as her ashes sit on my mantel. Her wish to be placed in the water on the way out East that we travel in our boat. Still, I am not ready to let her go again. It comforts me her being here even if it is just her ashes. This process is a sharp cut to my heart; death, ashes, placing them in the water! Emotionally even if in my heart I know she stands right by me on the other side of the veil.

“Children are the anchors that hold a mother to life.” – Sophocles

For some reason, it is her hands that I remember most. I can picture in my mind her slender fingers, manicured nails. Later in life, she would hold her index fingers up crippled from arthritis. So crooked she would tell me they hurt as she tried to straighten them but couldn’t. I can remember we held hands whenever we were walking side by side somewhere. Our fingers laced together – her fingers so cool to the touch I now recall.

As her daughter, I am witness to seeing her in me at times. A flash of insight or quick look or glance in a mirror as I walk pass. I smile at these times to myself, that yes I am her child. Sometimes the simple way I sit when watching television or drink from a cup recalls to mind a picture of her. She was twenty years older than me. I can remember her as an amazingly young woman at heart.

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Since her transition, I have been delving into my life growing up with her as my mom. I’ve asked a few questions of myself and have come to know some interesting aspects of her and who I was to her before the onset of dementia. As a metaphysical practitioner, I know of the power we possess to manifest our lives by our thoughts, words, and actions. We are powerful in manifesting everything we want and do not want in our daily lives. We do not realize the strength of our personal beliefs.

Metaphysically dementia’s probable cause and belief is a refusal to deal with the world as it is. Hopelessness and anger. If only my mom had chosen to believe she was in her perfect place and that she was safe, I wonder how free she would have been of her nightmares all of these years. Her anger was part of her fear that she imagined due to the losses in her life.

I only recall the stories she chose to share of her childhood, her belief in God and for years her nightly reciting of the rosary. Not having a wealthy upbringing and being one of nine children during a very different time in life than how she raised me, I praise her today for doing the best she knew how under the circumstances.

“Many of our fears are tissue paper thin and a single courageous step would carry us through them.” – KMH

She survived it all; fear, alcoholism, abuse and death until she could no longer close her eyes and be witness to the pain anymore. Dementia crept in slowly at first until she was no longer the woman I knew her to be. It is a slower death to the person and the family then choosing to die. I write choosing because I believe we choose our life experiences and all that we want to learn in life from our parents, our children, the place of birth, family and friends as well.

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We are born to love, heal and grow our souls. To love unconditionally all, to forgive, awaken to our truth and our freedom. However, many of us like my mom become frozen in the depths of their fear – their past. They cherish what never was possible because of death, and then cling to their pain daily and stay in the mindset of fear. For many the greatest of fears is death!

“Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?” – Henry David Thoreau

My mom never knew of her greatness. Her entire being became engulfed with too much fear of life and what it could do to her. I saw as a young girl how terrified she was of my dad and how she finally had to walk away from the fear after twenty-five years. When my brother was killed suddenly by a drunk driver on his way home from work, she began her descent into escaping from this world as she knew it. The pain was unbearable, and her grief took her away from my family and me when she chose to leave New York and move back to her hometown in Puerto Rico.

At first, I felt abandoned, actually for years I felt that she left me. Today, I know it was her grief that she tried to get away from and it had nothing to do with me. Recently, my son told me that he felt that she abandoned him and his siblings as well as, me twenty-six years ago, I was surprised! It is during these types of a moment that forgiveness comes into play. I believe she did what she needed to do at the time to survive the pain. It never helps to take anything someone else does personally. Many have trouble speaking their truth and fear is part of the anxiety of their day. It is all they know and cannot express their feelings. I believe this was true of my mom.

“Motherhood is … difficult and … rewarding …” – Gloria Estefan

 

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Recently, I have been thinking about my life with my mom and my thoughts about her as a mom. Today, I know she did the best that she could, and my favorite memory of her was her childish behavior at times and holding hands with her whenever we walked somewhere. I would like to say to her that I understand and I know she loved me in her way but could not handle the pain and fear. I no longer feel abandoned by her actions to move away from my family and me. The greatest sadness I felt at her passing was that she had never met my six grandchildren. Then I think to myself can this be part of the plan that we agreed to at one time in spirit form. It matters not anymore because it is in the past and can never be any other way. I must stay in the present! To do so, I must live out my dreams. These were her choices and as her daughter I respect them. Fear was her choice for her entire life. Had she chosen Love things would have been different. There are not many choices but only two that we all get to choose from. Ask yourself how do you choose to live your life? Is it with fear or love? Fear is the roar of your ego from within. Love is the whisper of God from within. Choose wisely!

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

At this time in my life as a wife, mother, mother-in-law and grandmother I thank my mom for all that I learned from her. I am who I am today because of her choices. I discovered my truth, my passion and who I want to show to the world as a spiritual being bursting with unconditional love to share. There was a time twelve years ago when I asked her to come back to New York and live with me. She refused! She believed she would ruin my marriage and her fears would destroy her and me. That was when dementia climbed into her mind and settled in for the journey. I thank God for this life experience with my mom, and I am forever grateful that I chose her.

Today, as a woman, I am blessed to know I have always been able to live by my strength and beliefs. I feel sad that my mom never knew how strong she was and that she loved me unconditionally and I had never realized it before. I always believed that I was a teacher to my children as all moms are. I was setting an example which I hope today they can realize themselves. Mothering a child is about unconditional love because loving them as they are is key to their fulfillment.

“Motherhood: All love begins and ends there.” – Robert Browning

My mom never tried to change me, nor did she try to influence me in any way to be different than I was. I can hear her voice if I close my eyes and listen to how proud she was of me as a mom and wife. I am happy to write that was a great lesson for me to learn from her. Today, during this month of May when we celebrate our mothers, I wish to say to mine, “thank you, mom!” Take a moment and say this simple prayer as well … “thank you, mom!”

 

Pray! Meditate! Journal!

www.LindaAmato.com

 

Life is Constantly Changing

“The magic of water has been in my life for years now as I wake up every day to  behold the beautiful sight of Mother Nature…”-Linda Amato

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My Backyard View

As I sit here in my library and fill with a heart full of gratitude for the days that are moving me forward. I am blessed. My life is wondrous. I am connected to Spirit. This belief of mine although alternative and difficult for many to comprehend has been rooted out of the depth of my soul from many lifetimes, I believe. I can remember the day even at this moment when I wondered if there was ‘more?’ I felt there had to be more to this experience we all call life. It was then that I begged for guidance in 2003 which led me to today.

“If you can’t be in awe of Mother Nature, there’s something wrong with you.” -Alex Trebek

It seems I was never truly aware but I did know I was not alone so I just moved one step in front of the other being a good girl. Quiet and silent was my belief, after all “Silence is golden!” As a child I was stronger then my brother and mother. I could handle more at a young age. There was an essence within that told me to be kind, loving and helpful. Never ever was I to be confrontational. Why? I wonder today why I could not have the power of speech until I was fifty. My answer this day is because it served me well to be silent and allowed me to be awakened to my truth. I know this because I believe there is a reason for everything.

“The most important this is to enjoy your life – to be happy – it’s all that matters.” -Audrey Hepburn

IMG_0749Raised in a time of change I never chose to be a rebel or  hippie yet, I felt I was never in the box. I obeyed my parents, elders and everyone. I questioned if they were right in my head but I never questioned them. There was always that inner essence that guided me daily. Human behavior is something I delight in and since I began studying with Deborah King in 2012 I have learned the many reasons we as humans do what we do.

At my age today: as a daughter, wife, mother, and grandmother I realize today the importance of women in my life. I have collected a tribe of my own that I have fallen in love with and I believe it is my way of being of service to them by sharing all that I can that is of alternative belief.  To begin with there is no right and no wrong way of living YOUR life experience. How can there be such a belief. We are here because we choose to be here on this planet at this time. We are a combination of soul and human. Our soul part is love and our human part is ego. That is where the battle within begins.

“We do not remember days, we remember moments.” -Cesare Pavese

We choose which one we are going to nourish daily by our thoughts, words and actions. What do you believe today that is different from what you believed yesterday? Change is constant because there is no way we can stay exactly the same in our thoughts, words and actions unless we fuel a life dedicated to negativity, unhappiness, regret and anger as our path because of something that happened a long time ago to us. As beings of love and light it is very difficult to choose the path of the ego/human belief daily. It is frustrating to realize that being angry or unhappy is not our nature. Especially since love seeps in when we bask in the beauty of Mother Nature, see or hold a baby, a sunset, smell a rose, fall in love, make love, celebrate a wedding, or birthday or just receive a compliment.

My question to you then is why not choose to nurture your soul/love part more often. When we choose to love we choose to transition and grow higher on the path of our journey. To choose love we must forgive ourselves and anything that happened by another to us in our past. We all have a choice to live as we choose to live so go for it! Just let go of anything that no longer serves you today.

“It is as grandmothers that our mothers come into the fullness of their grace. – Christopher Morley

I have chosen love and I believe that I have been able to nourish and nurture my soul daily. Is it easy, you ask? I can honestly say it is getting easier! The wonder of my life is the children that I share my life with from the ages of 8, 6, 4, 3, 2, and 1 month. It is magical to hold a baby in your arms and know she is heaven sent as an angel to share her love and light in the world. To talk to a child and listen, really listen to what scares him or what fills him with joy. To wrap your arms around a sleeping child and carry him into his home to rest all toasty and really heavy. To bathe a child and laugh as he laughs at the wonderment of water that fills him with delight. To watch the ballerina from within surface in her as she spins around or sings a song. Then there is the child that fills your heart to bursting for the simplicity of his outlook on life. Yes, I am truly blessed.

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I remember my children growing up and I always took time to listen to their stories and imagine today if you can, because they still reach out to me to tell me their stories. As a mother I learned the greatest of lessons from my mom to love unconditionally all, especially the children. As I sit here and type I wonder what will be because my grand babies are coming over to go in the pool and I am ready to play and swim with them because they are pure beings of love and light still and I know it. Yet, I also notice the changes that are screaming to be let free by them to be able to just be. Many children today are new souls and are clueless as to how to live in our world They need us as old souls to teach them. What better way to teach them then to love them unconditionally, hear them and explain life to them.

“A house needs a grandma in it.” -Louise May Alcott

I’m amazed at the love that fills my heart for these grand babies that are being raised by my children. I reflect back on my days of being their mom and truly can write I don’t know how I did it, except for the one fact that I loved every moment. I enjoyed being a mom and all it entailed! I live in a very large home that most days now is quiet. There is no more laughter, crying, yelling or playing. Yet in my minds eyes I can almost see them all at the dinner table. Having dinner when they were older was my favorite time as we sat for hours discussing their day. Today I believe I raised four amazing children because I simply took the time to really hear what they had to say. Now the voices of six grand babies fills my home when they visit and sadly, I know the silence will return when they leave. The beauty of my life is that I enjoy everyday just looking outside my kitchen to the love of Mother Nature that has comforted me all these years.

Meditate. Pray. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

http://www.DeborahKing.com

LA Believes in Love

As I continue writing on the shift of transformation that I was led to I feel blessed to share my journey. After traveling a life experience of loving unconditionally I found that I needed more in life. It was a time when my soul cried out to me. I was led to what I call Part “B” of my journey. A book opened my heart to experience a path that is believable but alternative for many. Yet, in my heart I ached to return to this part of myself.

I did not tread lightly on this new adventure as I flew forward anxious at times and fearful but within I knew I had to move forward. I ask myself always can one book simply allow me to believe as I do today and I must answer it was this one step that led  me to walk many steps.

This book that I speak of is by Louis L. Hay and I discovered it in a little quaint bookstore in Woodstock New York. In reading You Can Heal Your Life, I discovered her Philosophy which I embraced with open arms as well as the ability of affirmations to inspire me daily.

Louise L. Hay writes:

We are responsible for all of our experiences. Every thought we think is creating our future. The point of power is always in the present moment. Everyone suffers from self-hatred and guilt. The bottom line for everyone is, “I’m not good enough.” It’s only a thought and a thought can be changed. We create every so-called illness in our body. Resentment, criticism and guilt are the most damaging patterns. Releasing resentment will dissolve even cancer. We must release the past and forgive everyone. We must be willing to begin to learn to love ourselves. Self-approval and self-acceptance in the now are the keys to positive change. When we really love ourselves, everything in our life works.

I discovered my inner child hanging tightly on to the lids of my eyes when I looked within. I felt her sadness and despair to survive. Clueless to how my childhood, marriage and life experiences had filled a part of me with sorrow I fell in love with her and in doing so, I began to love me just as I was.

After reading this book I wrote affirmations for twenty-one days for twenty-one times until my thought process changed. I still say the same affirmations today that I began with in 2003 daily.

I trust the process of life to bring only good to me. I am safe. All is well. I am as God created me, a spiritual being of love and light. I only create peaceful experiences because I love myself. I am healthy, happy and whole body, mind and soul. There is time and space for everything.

This 246 page book is what enlightened me to open my heart and believe in me. I had many years of despair, depression and doubt in who I was due to the journey. Death has the way of manifesting a desire to know and understand reasons why everything happens. Abuse makes us look within to wonder why we are treated unkindly. Abandonment makes us wonder why we are not loved. Life has this way of allowing us to experience different emotions and fear no matter who we are. I credit this book to open wide the window of my soul to finally be nourished.

There are many books, classes and workshops I have enjoyed and I look forward to sharing with you the power and process of positive thought, word and action. My teachers have been many and I hope you enjoy the ride with me.

Pray. Meditate. Journal

www.LindaAmato.com

LA Believes in Love,

My role as wife and mom filled me with joy. I imagine as women that stay at home we experience the unique balancing of the stages of our children’s growth process. School, homework, tests, sports, music, dance and the many ways we need to beat the clock daily. Yet we survive it all. Dating today has amazed me raising four children as I never dated but have been with my husband since the 7th grade. Definitely different times. I have one rule and that is who they love I love.

As I witness the expansion of my family with marriage and babies I realize that generationally we are all raised in different surroundings. As such, no one can comprehend another’s childhood and acceptance is needed. Acceptance and love allows us to not be critical or judgmental. This I strive for in my life. I believe the soul aches to be nourished as we enter into all relationships. it matters not who we are in relationship with we are all given the choice of how we react to them. Love needs to be the foundation in all relationships not just for babies or our pets. When we strive for excellence others will also.

When my youngest daughter at seventeen and she left for college my life shifted.  It was a time of  deep reflection for me as motherhood responsibilities were eliminated. Three of my children moved out of the home at this time and the tears began to fall. I questioned why I had not prepared for this moment. With a deep ache in my heart I prayed to know where I was headed. The word “share” became part of my vocabulary.  As a mom for twenty-four years at this point in time, I had shared my love, time, and wisdom with my children. Now what? It is in these times of emotional sadness where we are rewarded with our purpose. An avid book person and a daily woman who took pen to paper,  I discovered God definitely had a plan for me.

Visiting my daughter in Arizona at ASU I began to read the book, You Can Heal Your Life by Louise L. Hay. The date was October 10, 2003! The definition of transformation is the act or process of transforming; the state of being transformed..

LA BELIEVES IN LOVE

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The purpose of my existence has been to love and be loved. I never questioned any other way of being. I simply knew to love. It mattered not the situation or how I was treated my choice was to love. At times when fear crept into my world I wrote poetry or took to my journal to make sense of others in my life being unkind. When I became a mother thirty-eight years ago the meaning of my being here was confirmed. To nurture and nourish with unconditional love was the key that unlocked the despair from yesterday.

There was a part of me that understood the natural essence of life and how to provide with my body through natural childbirth and breast feeding a cord that would sustain us both. This wonder in my first son was a miracle with my husband that we would create a total of four times. The memories I have stored away that I treasure from the very moment I met these babies has sustained me to know my purpose. I believe that they set the stage for what I do today in more ways than one can imagine. As a single mom my children kept me sane. I realized early that I never owned them and that I was simply the means of their existence and foundation.

I deeply loved the responsibilities that came with this new title I proudly wore that I was chosen to be the mother of Tory, Tina, Nicholas and Jessica. Dinner time was family time where we gathered together to share our day and to laugh. You may wonder if there was conflict, rebellion and disagreement between these siblings and society. I fool you not and share that we existed as a family bonded by a mother that saw no wrong in her children. Boundaries were a key ingredient in their world as they grew up. Do not think that they did not call to my attention the judgmental and critical attitude of their teachers. Still, I stood firm in my belief in my children no matter what.

Children learn by love and support which they received abundantly. Who they have grown to be in essence as husband, father, wife and mother is critical to how they were raised. The two youngest ones who are not married yet still have time to choose how they will approach the world of being a spouse or parent.

What they have accomplished today is their freedom to live in a world where many have fallen victim to drugs. Is this the reality of a society that has fallen victim to substances, due to the fact of pain, choice or a prearranged contract? Why does one choose to be addicted and another not? Only God knows the answer to that.

In reality, I am a child of an alcoholic but I chose not to be one. Is there a lesson here that I simply learned that I grasped at a young age? Can it be that what I was witness to was part of the plan? As we are all children at one time raised by our parents very early on, I wonder who is the teacher and who is the student?

Today as I blog my baby has turned thirty years old. I am amazed at how time is the one thing we can not stop or change or return to in our reality of life. Time does not wait for anyone. Children will grow up with or without love I imagine. Although I do believe as a mom that my greatest and only reason for being is to love these children under all circumstances.

Who I am today on this path that I travel is because of them, my husband and my parents. Many have travelled along with me and some have stayed while others ventured away. Know that we are all here to light the way for another with love.

Transformation is next…

Pray. Meditate. Journal.
www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES IN LOVE

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The innocence of my life was that I loved. The path of my life has led me on a journey that I never questioned or wondered about. Placing one step in front of the other I walked forward trusting and believing in my destiny. I imagine at times that fear gripped me and tried to delay that which I needed to learn by the power of  my ego to fill my head because of the situation of my home life. The journey has a way of allowing us to stumble at times and pick ourselves up and move forward on this path we call life.

Raised in to believe in God, I went to Catholic school where real nuns in black dresses and huge rosary beads put fear and belief in sin in everyone. That I loved was simply my foundation of being taught to be a good girl. The rituals of my religion I embraced with open arms. Prayer, church and confession were weekly if not sometimes daily. Somehow when I was younger the air on Sunday was different to me. The sounds and people on a Sunday were different, as well.  I cannot explain it but Sunday was a holy day and a family day. The silence in the air I imagine today was because no one worked and all the stores were closed. It was peaceful to go to the Avenue and find that every store was closed. This was a time when there were no malls imagine that! My dad would go to the bakery and after church we had cheese Danishes and apple turnovers. When I was older and no longer in Catholic school I skipped church and walked the Avenue. Once in high school there was no one to answer to and the taste of freedom too great. Needless to say, I held fast to my prayers but the rituals of my childhood slipped away. I was too busy now.

What does the word love really mean? Love in the dictionary states a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child or friend. Such innocence of affection led me to marry my childhood boyfriend and begin one amazing ride. We grew up during these past forty-four years together in our marriage. We truly lived an existence that was separate at times and filled with emotion at others. I was taught by my parents as he was taught by his about how to be in a relationship. I cannot speak for his childhood because I was not living in his home. Mine although briefly described prior to this page, I saw a father who cherished his wife although he scared her to death because of his addictions. It was this witnessing of separation between them as my brother and I went with my dad everywhere and during the last thirty years of his life it was I who spent time with him and cherished him. My mom’s detachment due to fear of him and me allowed her to favor my brother so the lesson I learned was to favor no one.  My husband and I had created a separate existence through the years while raising four children. I find this interesting to realize today because our roles somehow reflected a part of our own upbringing.

Blessed to be a stay at home mom it was my husband who has provided everything for our family. His drive and desires enabled us to live a life filled with abundance. A man of many talents he is a builder of homes today because he started his journey in construction but at one time he owned and ran two restaurants, a resale automobile business and a record label, as well as, being a manager for our daughter’s singing career.

Still I wonder always when did the innocence leave. Is it simply part of living at this time on planet earth that somehow, somewhere more became a requirement to exist. Why did we choose to go further than our parents in every way? Was it offered to us because of our education, beliefs or simply the fact that change and growth is part of the plan for everyone. An example I think of was that I grew up without a car. At one time we had seven cars in our home. Another would be; I grew up with a telephone only in the kitchen. Our house had one in every bedroom and there were five, living room and even in our master bathroom which brought it to a total of eight. Is this all considered progress, want or necessity.

Now that we are alone in our large house we have only one television in the living room and we have downsized to five telephones and three cars. My life is abundant and yes I am grateful beyond words for the ride i have been allowed to experience. My yesterdays have taken me to a place of deep understanding that there is a reason for everything and there are no mistakes ever in life.

To come … the children!

Pray. Meditate. Journal

www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES IN LOVE

 

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In reflection, I would like to write that my life has been just like yours if you have been raised in a home with an alcoholic or fearful and detached parent. I was blessed being born in 1951 with a simple existence of not knowing how another friend of mine lived. Being clueless of what went on in someones home, therefore, I was not aware that my family life was anything but perfect. The word dysfunctional did not enter my mind until I was a mom myself and searching for my path.

Stories that I have are many but they are in the past where they belong. I married young to my 7th grade sweetheart. We grew up together and in doing so we just put one foot in front of the other and here we are forty-four years later. Proud parents of four amazing children and five delicious grand babies. We never planned, we never spoke of money, never traveled and we never ever involved our parents in our life.

I believe that my parents generation were extremely close to theirs because they were breast fed. There was a deep sense of family and it was a time where family all lived within the same neighborhood. The bond between mother and child is secure in the aspect of nourishing the baby with ones own body. I was not breast fed nor were most of my generation because of formula being invented. Please share your thoughts on this aspect whether you were breast fed or not. It is an interesting concept I feel that breast feeding connects the child in a different way compared to a bottle fed baby and it is that simplicity to life that we need to connect back to. Of course, it is different today because most babies are breast fed. I started having babies in 1977 and my last was born in 1985 and I enjoyed the comfort, touch and bond I felt by breast feeding. There are exceptions to everything in life and our choices as parents have a deep well of power when it comes to our children.

I look back on the fact that my dad only went to the 6th grade, as well as, my mom. It was a time for them to have their dreams and desires but unable to manifest that which would propel them to a life of joy. Love was the key to their existence. I believe love is the basis and foundation as well as the purpose we are here. He worked nights up until he was 40 years old when he had a mental breakdown and attempted suicide. It was then that a shift developed within my family life that took me into the minds of the mentally ill at the age of eighteen. He lived another thirty years in and out of psychiatric hospitals and different adult homes. Then right after I married at twenty, my mom divorced him and he became my responsibility until his death of lung cancer at seventy.

Dad had a deep love and connection to Mother Nature. He walked everywhere, he loved the beach and going to indoor pools in the winter. He loved music and the movies. He was a simple but wise man to me. He loved being outside in a park or just walking through the streets. He walked everywhere.

My mom the fearful one never journeyed with us out into the streets of our neighborhood or New York City, nor did she swim with us. It was always as far back as I can remember my dad, brother and me. Of course, there were drunken episodes and I make light of them because I never feared my dad. I feared for him. Today, I realize my moms fear of my dad when in a drunken state kept her at home where she could be safe for awhile.

I am blessed to understand the past of my parents life and mine had reason and purpose. Truly I think back on these memories with love and know that my parents did the best that they could.

I shared a life journey with my parents that I continue to respect even today. I honor them in the best way that I am capable of by taking the gifts that I received from them and with love I share them through the written word and being fearless.

Innocence, love and marriage is coming…

Pray. Journal. Meditate.

http://www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES in LOVING LIFE

I am amazed and grateful for the powers of the Universe. Truly we all need to connect to the light within. I have travelled a journey that is filled with change, love, light and happiness. As a daughter, wife, mother and grandmother the choices I make affect those around me. I have always been aware that I am an example for others, especially my children. As I reflect on my childhood and the foods I consumed they seem to me today to be very basic. Milk, Cereal,Meat, Chicken, Lamb, Shrimp, Potatoes, Rice, Corn, Cold cuts, Applesauce, Ice cream, potato chips and chocolate chip cookies. Not a wide variety of foods. Almost forgot Nathan’s hot dogs were a favorite of my dad which we all ate.

When I met my husband, I fell in love with italian food. A change in my diet led me to become a carb eater. Now I did not become a brave woman who tried everything and ate everything but I did eat differently. I had an inner knowing of not drinking when I ate, not choosing to eat sauces on my food, which drives my husband crazy. I actually eat dry pancakes, french toast and most foods without additional butter, syrup or gravy. Mostly stayed away from fast foods except for the occasional hit back in the day. Never was a soda drinker which I find amusing since my dad worked for American Beverage!

Somewhere along this amazing journey I found out I was lactose intolerant and intolerant to other foods as well that I consumed regularly. Late in life, I introduced green vegetables and salad into my diet, began juicing and educated myself about organics and learned that we are what we eat. I became a vegetarian then I tried to be vegan. Well, my body was rebelling and I chose to listen and learn.

The following ingredients are in our foods that we eat and that we feed our children. As I am an avid reader and realize many do not choose to read because they don’t have the time I do or the desire I do! Please just read this and begin to read food labels and pay attention to what you are eating. If  you feel the need to educate yourself in anyway about the foods we consume, then please buy the book, The Food Babe Way by Vani Hari. Begin to eat Organic foods and drink Organic Milk today. If you want to know why these ingredients are unhealthy for your body and what foods your are eating that they are in, then you have to read the book, The Food Babe Way.

– High Fructose Corn Syrup
– Natural and Artificial Flavors
– Food dyes
– Caramel Color (class IV)
– MSG (MONOSODIUM GLUTAMATE)
– Potassium Sorbate
– Sulfites
– Monsanto Milk = GMO (genetically modified organisms)
– Carrageenan
– Canola Oil
– Peanut Oil with TBXQ
– Cottonseed oil
– Trans fats (partially hydrogenated oils)
– Artificial Sweetners

Please click on the link below to read my Article, Do You Believe You Are Eating Healthy?
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Linda_Amato

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LA BELIEVES …

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The Power of Belief

Today, IAM 62 years old and I no longer believe as I was raised to believe because I journeyed a path to find my truth. In dong so, I found that God rests within me, actually in my heart. An avid reader I devoured books on other teachings when it came to individual beliefs. In my travels I discovered prayers that comforted me as well as nourished a part of me which I call my soul. My belief in God as my truth led me to study that which opened me to a main religion which I call LOVE!

Through the act of journaling IAM able to discover a life I chose, to be a beacon of light for others. There was a time I was not aware of this light that shined from within. Today, I know it is my purpose – my passion! IAM led by Spirit! This inner voice is clearly heard by me. I follow its guidance. It is my belief that IAM never alone. I smile as I write this because I deeply know there is a comforting world waiting to be embraced by all. I trust with my heart that all is exactly as it is meant to be for me. In reflection just in this past year I notice I listened to the guidance I received and became a way shower for others. I thank you God for that!

The past year, 2013, was a year of love; celebrating birthdays, anniversaries and marriages. We all turned a year older and my two youngest grand babies completed their first year.  The months were filled with parties as we came together with family and friends as one filled with laughter and joy. I have been always looking for my place and I feel I have found my way now. 2013 was the year I began my weekly blog and gave birth to a Monthly Healing Circle of Love which has brought women together in a safe haven to share their stories. The discovery of one’s passion and purpose as I have accomplished is through many different avenues but the main sign is that which excites you and when performing it time flies by.

Meditating, praying and journaling are my rituals to start my day. The routines of  daily life are the same for many I imagine because we exist solely on what we know and how we were raised. Personally, i was never taught to meditate before I opened the door to alternative belief. However, the depth of my meditating did not escalate until I studied with Deborah King and was taught by her. I believe today that I can be the person that is calm, worry-free and accepting because of the simplicity of meditating 20 minutes a day. Praying and journaling have been part of my journey as long as I can remember but now it is consistently a daily part of my life.

Today, the fifteenth day of the New Year I look forward to the surprises that await in this coming year. The books I will be led to read. The men and women’s stories I will hear. Those people the Universe will send to me to share all that I know as a Holistic Counselor. The times we shall come together with love in our hearts as family and friends. The wonder and excitement in the eyes of my children as they are amazed by the wonder of their children. The miracles that will set us free and that will open our hearts towards one another. The joy that fills my soul when I speak to my children all in the same day. The happiness I receive when I spend time with my grandbabies. I believe I live a wondrous life experience and I do look forward to not knowing the future but opening my heart to all.

I have discovered that I have reached inner peace that comforts my daily journey through my beliefs in a universe that guides me forward in this world. Meditating, prayer and journaling have become a passion and nourishment every day. Through these actions IAM nurtured. These tools are my primary food in life, as well as, a few others I have in my tool box while living a human experience as a Spiritual being.

The following is excerpted from my book: Making Believers: Connect to the Light within…

Nourishment

I need to do this for myself

I need to find solace

I need to feel silence

Within me runs a current of energy

That desires to be ignited

And burn brighter for all eternity

God will accomplish this dream to nourish me

As I spread His Love through my creativity!

 

Meditate, Pray Journal

Learn to Meditate at:  www.DeborahKingCenter.com

Purchase Book at:     www.BalboaPress.com / www.Amazon.com / www.BarnesandNoble.com

Know me at:              www.LindaAmato.com / www.MakingBelievers.com / www.BelievableAlternatives.com

 

 

LA BELIEVES …

 

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IAM GRATEFUL …

Being thankful and filled with gratitude at this time of year also comes with a bit of sadness for many. This past week I found myself a bit emotional while driving in my car. A song on the radio reminded me of my dad who has been gone since 1998. Thoughts filled my head that Thanksgiving day was my brother’s favorite holiday but he’s been gone since 1988. I think of my mom who stopped making his favorite stuffing that year and has dementia now and has drifted away from me as well. I allow the emotions to fill me up as tears fall knowing that there is nothing I can do about their choices in life. I write the word ‘choices’ because I read once that all deaths are considered a form of suicide because we manifest and create our lives by our thoughts, words and actions. I breathe in, take a moment to send them all my love. Yes, I miss them. Yes, I do wish they were here. Still I take the memories stored deep in my heart and smile at the ride I have been on.

My life is full with unbelievable abundance as I will share my home with those who are my family and friends. I have an amazing group of characters in my life and they bless me because I laugh with them, cry and fill with love for each one. I have been led down this path of acceptance and it comforts me to know that IAM not responsible for another’s actions. We all have free will and allowed to choose for ourselves how we want to be portrayed to others. I bless everyone with a small thought today to be a being of love during this time of being thankful and gathering with family and friends.

My oldest son has given me the gift of another daughter to love and three beautiful grandchildren. My mind fills with the memory of my life as a mom all those years ago and I wonder how did I do it all. Being a mom is a great gift but also emotional and at times filled with struggle.

My oldest daughter has blessed me with another son to love as well and a beautiful grandson. I watch her and see myself. My God, she has become me. It’s true! She is calmer and enjoying her son, husband and home which is all I can ask for. We as daughters either fight to be different then our mom or just like her. I see through the eyes of a deep well of love that there is a tiny part of my heart in all my children.

At this time my younger son who has never left home is following his heart to move out and expand his soul. I gather my thoughts around this and fill with an emotion that I shall now be where I started 42 years ago … just me and my husband. We have come full circle! The silence in the home is welcomed but at the same time the echo of their laughter and voices will always fill me up. A mother never forgets the simplicity of their child while they nursed them, held and hugged them. Those are life long moments that I shall always treasure.

My youngest daughter is the bravest of all my children as she has chosen a path of being of service and traveling far from all of us and now lives in California. Sometimes as a mom all I had to do was listen, support and say ‘yes’ to them. Of course I mixed in love to let them know how perfect they all are in their own way. My little girl amazes me the most because she is living a life connected to her soul’s passion and purpose. I wonder if I had anything to do with that?

IAM grateful that they all chose me as their mom. I know I have my memories to carry on my path forward and I pray somehow they too remember the fun, laughter, joy and love I embraced them with all those years ago and still do.

I marvel at these amazing people that surround me and help me to live my truth and expand my soul by the lessons I learn from them still. I know they have literally been gifts and on loan for me but every night I smile when I remember the joy that I have spoken to each of my four that day.

Rituals, traditions, gathering together with people who have been there through the years is my greatest reason for being filled with gratitude.  IAM abundant! I have been blessed with an amazing mother-in-law, father-in-law, sister-in-laws, brother-in-law and nieces and nephews, as well as, friends. I would like to take this time to thank them for all the years we shared  the holidays through the happy and sad times. I love you all. 

Happy Thanksgiving!

Pray. Meditate. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

LA Believes

As I look outside my window the beauty of Mother Nature expands my heart to open. I am extremely blessed because I live on the water  and every morning, day and night I embrace this awesome sight. The memories I carry in my minds eye of my children growing up here fills me with unconditional love for life on a whole. Now as a grandmother I get to see my grand babies fill with joy when they come here to go in the pool, fish off the dock or just watch the different boats and jet skis go by. My oldest grandson had his first four birthday parties here and starts with the first sunny day to ask if the pool is open yet? We have had many parties and celebrations during the past twenty-six years but the fondest of memories for me, is the quiet in the early morning as I ponder life looking at the flow of water.

Of course, during the different seasons of the year the view changes but in difficult times in life that I have experienced it was always Mother Nature that offered me a way to heal. To simply step out my kitchen door onto the deck and thank her for her beauty and let the sun fill my being, to read a book with a cup of coffee and know I  am nourished by these surroundings because I experience this beauty daily when I just sit outside or look out. The birds chirping, the ducks quacking, swans swimming by this time of year is a delight to all my senses and I am grateful to be alive!

I have respected her beauty and all that she offers me from a very young age. My father taught me to treat her with love and I have. I am tender with her as I recycle, have a water filter in my home, do not use bleach or harmful chemicals to clean and clean up after others whenever I see garbage, especially in women’s bathrooms. I don’t let the water run before taking a shower or while I am brushing my teeth, as well as buying recycled products such as paper towels and toilet paper. I also have this ache that settles in my heart when it comes to waste of any kind. Paying attention to the stuff in our lives and not throwing out good items of any kind but donating them to those in need who are less fortunate helps as well. Simple little rituals in life that we can all pay attention to daily to respect this great home we all share.

I wonder at times how can someone not pay attention to their surroundings? If you see garbage pick it up. If you use plastics, please recycle them, choose safe products to clean your home with not harsh chemicals that go down the drain into Mother Nature, especially in theses times now where Mother Nature, our Earth, our home is crying out to us.

May God continue to bless our beautiful Mother and give her a tremendous hug from all of us at this time of the year.

www.makingbelievers.com

LA Believes

MY SON’S TABLE …

I looked around and was witness to the beauty of four generations; the oldest just turning 90 years old a few days ago, while the youngest will be 8 months this week! My heart filled with love for them all, as we shared another meal as family in celebration of Easter Sunday. I remembered those that had sat with us in the past and my soul whispered a sigh of memory for that which had come and gone for now.

There was an abundance of food and laughter as we shared many hours together. I was amazed that the four little ones, the new generation were clueless to the meaning of the day, only due to the fact that they were all under four years of age but were filled with joy that we had gathered together. 

How marvelous the day was as I was witness to an energy that can only be called, “Love!” We were enjoying being a family as we shared the day sitting around the table. I believe I am in awe of God and His power to show me that the little things to treasure in life are the moments we come together as a family, laughing, eating, hugging and kissing. It was a day to embrace the beauty of abundance that filled our hearts, not the food that filled our bellies. 

I felt grateful to be alive! I was thankful for those I share my life with! I felt a serge of love for everyone! I am blessed for the experience of awareness.

I shall store these new memories in my mind with all the rest as I travel this path, called life. No matter how I look at it, I fill with love for all the experiences through the years, the tender moments that begin with a new life as we travel this journey together until it changes and one moves on. The greatest gift I have been given is to know I need to stop and smell the roses along the path of life …

 

 

 

Linda Amato, Certified Holistic Health Counselor, Reiki Master, Metaphysical Practitioner, Author of Making Believers:Connect to the Light within …

www.BelievableAlternatives.com

www.MakingBelievers.com

 

 

LA Believes

There is a very thin line I am experiencing between the demons of the first three chakras; fear, guilt and shame when it comes to being held accountable in life to the passions of the soul. I ask are these mine to claim or are they projected upon me? We live in a society where fear, guilt and shame are expected as a part of our life experience. I reject this belief! I AM fearless! I  AM guiltless! I AM shameless! There can be no other avenue in my mind at this time.

Whether one is man or women it matters not what is taught or gifted to us by our parents, friends, family, or society. If any of it fills us with fear, guilt or shame we must ask ourselves is it truly ours or is this a projection of how we have been raised or taught to accept as our life experience. 

The soul knows best of the passions that will nourish each of us daily. Whether it be our foundation and connection to Mother Nature, the need to create through any form of art that fills us with joy as we move with the flow of life forward and to stand in our own power to know who we are and walk the path we have been guided on is the essence within that is sacred to all individually.

Acceptance of our journey allows a belief that we accept and respect another’s journey by offering unconditional love. It seems such a simple belief to say and know in your heart, ” I love you just as you are!” However, few can truly know this feeling within themselves if they never reject their own fear, guilt and shame. I ask of all to look within and find the love for oneself as you are first so that you can begin to love another truly. Let’s project the feeling of LOVE onto one another!

Just let it go … Meditate … Journal … Pray … Walk … Affirm

LA Believes

What am I looking for? I have Asked myself. Those who I love and cherish have also asked this question of me!

In the past I was looking for my belief in life, is the answer I was given. At this stage of my path I wanted answers to yesterday’s life. It seemed to me that my present life was transforming. I had a secret that I held close to my heart because I was unaware of the outcome but a desire pushed me forward to find my freedom, my belief, and unconditional love for me and for all.

I was not able to tell you back then who I was going to be or how I was going to go about being who I am today but there was an inner light that connected me in knowing that I was returning to me. I don’t know if this makes sense but I had to go back to the beginning of this life experience and find something. I  was developing a process through meditation where I began to understand for myself that my life has been about lessons and that everything happens for a reason.

The first lesson I learned was that we are all teachers and that Earth is a classroom where we are to learn to love one another by awakening from our dream state and remember our truth. I began with my parents and the lessons I learned from them.  This filled me with a deeper love and understanding for their own lives and the reasons they were who I chose this lifetime to learn from.

My dad taught me the true meaning of unconditional love for every human being, strangers included and the beauty of Mother Nature. An avid walker, he showed me how to bask in the sunlight, dream and appreciate the beach, parks and stars. It was his voice that spoke to me of kindness, love and respecting all of life. True acceptance of him allowed me to accept all and I must say to never be embarrassed of another’s actions. On this his 15th year Anniversary of passing I smile with the memory of our walks and talks. I miss you dad!

My mom taught me to favor no one and to do my responsibilities as a wife and mother with love and a song in my heart. I travelled with her on a journey of truth and found that truly we are all taught by our parents and I made a point to always remember that I was setting an example for my children because of her. Her wisdom and pain I realized were erased by those that she believed she had to listen to because of the generation she was born into. She never had the chance to have her voice and to follow her  dreams but as her daughter, hopefully I helped her to live through me and know she was a great teacher, mom and friend who I truly learned so much from. The pains, fears and sorrow she carried in her heart this lifetime has allowed her to finally escape from it all. She has dementia now and how I would love to hear her voice when I speak to her say, “hi, Lyn!”

My path has been a deep journey of discovery which I shall continue to embrace and share.

LA Believes

The Path one travels in life seems to be something which all believe needs to be searched for!

What if the path is where our feet stand at this exact moment in time?

What if there is no need to search for anything at all?

Personally, I have lived a life filled with interesting lessons that I have learned from, which have been part of my path. I haven made choices in life that have empowered me to continue always on my path forward, although sometimes a bit slow. I smile at the memory of the freedom of my youth, as well as the fears I learned, a marriage at a young age, where I was clueless to who I was and would be and then the joys of motherhood. However, through those years I had many detours to embrace with a belief of my own that unconditional love is the best medicine in the world.

My learning experiences have created in me an awareness that I always have a choice. Sometimes I chose silence for many years (these were the slow years) only to digest that which I could not comprehend from those I loved. Other times, I roared as a lion to protect my cubs, who I respected and knew that one day they would have to leave me because I did not own them. There were times where I escaped into a good book or I should write many a book, just to rest for awhile. For me the daily writing of my experiences cleared a wider path to walk. At times I took to my bed with a heavy heart depressed and dealing with grief that had suddenly come upon me. Through all the years of my life I acquired a belief that if I did anything with love in my heart I would be okay.

When a fork appealed on my path one day I had a choice to make which would change and transform my life tremendously but I believe today I was led and have always been led to rise and continue on by a force which I call my Higher Self, God, or Jesus! At times I doubted myself and all that I was transforming, learning and creating. I wondered if this was possible for me, at this age, at this time? I began to seek, search and acquire with a belief that I needed more.

Recently, I came under the awareness that I am on a golden path filled with singing birds, beautiful flowers, strong trees, blue skies and a sun that warms my soul as the stars twinkle above me in the night. Where I stand today, as I AM, is my path.

LA Believes

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It only takes a moment in your life when you finally hear the voice of your soul crying out to you. It may be time to release the silence that roars in your head, the creativity that sleeps and the passion that aches from within unfulfilled! It matters not if you are a man or a women but I imagine women slowly walk away from their voice of truth, their desire to create and what the passion in their heart is that needs to be shared by the responsibilities of their life.  My belief stems from my own life experience as a woman.

I was thinking of my life and the changes I have created these past years last week when I realized I am exactly where I am meant to be and these are the words below that I wrote in the form of a poem. Married forty-one years to my one and only childhood boyfriend we have shared a lifetime of love, loss, tears and fears. However, I believe his greatest fear had to be when my soul cried out to me and I began to love me, to know my truth, to discover there was more in life for me. He struggled with this change and still must wonder where I go to but I have learned I have not walked away from him or the life we have created together but away from that which no longer nourished my soul!

When My Soul Cried Out To Me

There was a young girl, innocent and pure

She fell in love one day and never imagined more

A life began filling her days with household chores

She had been taught well to love these chores and never, ever asked for more!

The babies arrived;  1, 2, 3, 4 and she discovered she had locked a door.

There was an inner part of her that felt that there had to be more?

A quick look in the mirror filled her with no resemblance of the girl from yesterday.

Then her soul cried out to her, “look, there is more, you must begin today…”

She fumbled and stumbled fearing to have to leave all that she knew

As the voice within never gave up its call to her to begin anew.

She felt pulled by an unknown force to say “goodbye” to her life!

The journey began for her to find her way back to herself which filled her with strife.

Never faltering to remain she moved forward for her soul ached from within everyday

As her soul whispered, “look for the mysteries that have been locked away…”

A passion for knowledge, sharing and loving all, she discovered one day

As many believed her insane for the changes she craved by the desires that filled her with wanting to open the door!

The years have flown by, the children are grown as she grew into herself with love.

She discovered a cycle, a pattern, a cry from her soul that there is still to be more…