THE KEYS OF FREEDOM

As a lover of the written word, I have spent my entire life taking pen to paper. Some may call it a form of therapy. I believe it is a release of that which no longer serves me that my mind clings to. In 1984, I began the journey of writing poetry to deal with stress in my life. For years I rarely felt the neeed to write a poem but more a type of journal writing when needed. In December of 2016 I was at a workshop with my teacher Deborah King in California. As I normally start my day with prayer, meditation and writing I started to write the following poem. I hope you are inspired by my words. My release. My form of therapy!

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I almost lost myself
“The Me of Me!”
In my Spirituality
I became numb to myself
“My Inner Reality!”
Never again,
Shall I stuff down deep within
“My Personality!”

I have laughed …
I have cried …
I needed to die …
From the woman I created
To please those who chose to berate
The brilliance of my light
But the darkness I dove into
Showed “Me.”
I needed to fight
For, “The Me of Me!”
To set “Me” Free …

Freedom is essential
I clearly now see
As a child raised in fear
I silenced the “Me” without a tear
I became a wife on a journey
Of discovery to finally hear

The voice of my inner child’s cry;
“Embrace me for I do not want to die,
Pull me free from the depths of this despair,
For I cannot breathe without your care …”

So I held onto her fingertips
From deep within my being
Knowing it was time to pull her
Up from an inner sorrow,
I was witnessing …

Struggling at first
because of the years
Of neglect of my inner beliefs
I discovered a voice to unravel
“The Me of Me …”

I had roared loudly as a mom
Filled with love, joy, and happiness
Proud of the honor to be chosen
So I became fearlessly
An advocate for those who needed “Me …”

My sanity I was gifted!
As their mom, I was bold
My Passion!
My Purpose!
Allowed me to unfold

With joy for the chores of my life
Stronger beyond even I knew,
I was able to handle all strife …

One may wonder of the time needed
To hug “Me” into becoming my Truth
A week …
A month …
A year …
For “Me” it seemed a lifetime
Of Journaling – Reading – Writing Poetry
By releasing my fears and finally
Allowing the tears!

Still, I subdued the real “Me of Me,”
Behind my Spirituality
Once again I silenced a part of my
Inner child’s laughter, joy, and happiness
Through this new sacred personality!

Today I believe as a spiritual being
I am here to experience my human creation
As I am,
The Divine Presence of God
In action
The “I” that “I AM,”
The “Me of Me.”
Finally …

Thankful!
Grateful!
Joyful!
For the lessons, I learned
Offers an acceptance for the
Sacrifices made,
By those who loved “Me,”
As I loved “them.”
Whether they be family
or friend.

I was aware of a vast resource
on the Ring of Keys!
The Discovery of my
Key of Freedom has
Opened the door
For me to experience more

Which then led “Me” to the
Key of Forgiveness!
To move forward on the path of my
Intended life experience
Once I embraced the Key of Forgiveness!
I experienced the
Key of Gratefulness!

Love…
Light…
Laughter…
Are the Keys to all spiritual passion,
And where I discovered my purpose,
The reason I was born!
The joy of being whole
Now living a large life
No longer being small

The memories of the “smallness,”
I achieved can be released
Today,
I know the path I traveled
Whether silent or not,
fueled my desires

My soul needed to feel nourished
and to be nurtured
Immediately!
So that I could spiritually divorce myself
from an unhealthy
Reality!

Still, I continued to struggle
With who I now was
To believe I could
Grow “Me” to be a better “Me,”
Filled with insight and a new reality!

It seems my belief of going within
For answers to my pain
Ignited a “Love of Self,”
I cherish, which erased
The belief I was insane…

Although I question if this has always been
“The Me of Me…”
Just silently waiting to claim “Me.”
As one who knows that everyone
Has the right to be free!

It is the core of my essence
I’ve connected with
joyfully…
Allowing my truth to unfold
courageously!

My soul is aware it is
nourished beyond and above
More than I could have ever imagined
Through the practice of
Prayer…
Meditation…
Intention…
And Love!

Pray. Meditate. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES …

 

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IAM GRATEFUL …

Being thankful and filled with gratitude at this time of year also comes with a bit of sadness for many. This past week I found myself a bit emotional while driving in my car. A song on the radio reminded me of my dad who has been gone since 1998. Thoughts filled my head that Thanksgiving day was my brother’s favorite holiday but he’s been gone since 1988. I think of my mom who stopped making his favorite stuffing that year and has dementia now and has drifted away from me as well. I allow the emotions to fill me up as tears fall knowing that there is nothing I can do about their choices in life. I write the word ‘choices’ because I read once that all deaths are considered a form of suicide because we manifest and create our lives by our thoughts, words and actions. I breathe in, take a moment to send them all my love. Yes, I miss them. Yes, I do wish they were here. Still I take the memories stored deep in my heart and smile at the ride I have been on.

My life is full with unbelievable abundance as I will share my home with those who are my family and friends. I have an amazing group of characters in my life and they bless me because I laugh with them, cry and fill with love for each one. I have been led down this path of acceptance and it comforts me to know that IAM not responsible for another’s actions. We all have free will and allowed to choose for ourselves how we want to be portrayed to others. I bless everyone with a small thought today to be a being of love during this time of being thankful and gathering with family and friends.

My oldest son has given me the gift of another daughter to love and three beautiful grandchildren. My mind fills with the memory of my life as a mom all those years ago and I wonder how did I do it all. Being a mom is a great gift but also emotional and at times filled with struggle.

My oldest daughter has blessed me with another son to love as well and a beautiful grandson. I watch her and see myself. My God, she has become me. It’s true! She is calmer and enjoying her son, husband and home which is all I can ask for. We as daughters either fight to be different then our mom or just like her. I see through the eyes of a deep well of love that there is a tiny part of my heart in all my children.

At this time my younger son who has never left home is following his heart to move out and expand his soul. I gather my thoughts around this and fill with an emotion that I shall now be where I started 42 years ago … just me and my husband. We have come full circle! The silence in the home is welcomed but at the same time the echo of their laughter and voices will always fill me up. A mother never forgets the simplicity of their child while they nursed them, held and hugged them. Those are life long moments that I shall always treasure.

My youngest daughter is the bravest of all my children as she has chosen a path of being of service and traveling far from all of us and now lives in California. Sometimes as a mom all I had to do was listen, support and say ‘yes’ to them. Of course I mixed in love to let them know how perfect they all are in their own way. My little girl amazes me the most because she is living a life connected to her soul’s passion and purpose. I wonder if I had anything to do with that?

IAM grateful that they all chose me as their mom. I know I have my memories to carry on my path forward and I pray somehow they too remember the fun, laughter, joy and love I embraced them with all those years ago and still do.

I marvel at these amazing people that surround me and help me to live my truth and expand my soul by the lessons I learn from them still. I know they have literally been gifts and on loan for me but every night I smile when I remember the joy that I have spoken to each of my four that day.

Rituals, traditions, gathering together with people who have been there through the years is my greatest reason for being filled with gratitude.  IAM abundant! I have been blessed with an amazing mother-in-law, father-in-law, sister-in-laws, brother-in-law and nieces and nephews, as well as, friends. I would like to take this time to thank them for all the years we shared  the holidays through the happy and sad times. I love you all. 

Happy Thanksgiving!

Pray. Meditate. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com