THE KEYS OF FREEDOM

As a lover of the written word, I have spent my entire life taking pen to paper. Some may call it a form of therapy. I believe it is a release of that which no longer serves me that my mind clings to. In 1984, I began the journey of writing poetry to deal with stress in my life. For years I rarely felt the neeed to write a poem but more a type of journal writing when needed. In December of 2016 I was at a workshop with my teacher Deborah King in California. As I normally start my day with prayer, meditation and writing I started to write the following poem. I hope you are inspired by my words. My release. My form of therapy!

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I almost lost myself
“The Me of Me!”
In my Spirituality
I became numb to myself
“My Inner Reality!”
Never again,
Shall I stuff down deep within
“My Personality!”

I have laughed …
I have cried …
I needed to die …
From the woman I created
To please those who chose to berate
The brilliance of my light
But the darkness I dove into
Showed “Me.”
I needed to fight
For, “The Me of Me!”
To set “Me” Free …

Freedom is essential
I clearly now see
As a child raised in fear
I silenced the “Me” without a tear
I became a wife on a journey
Of discovery to finally hear

The voice of my inner child’s cry;
“Embrace me for I do not want to die,
Pull me free from the depths of this despair,
For I cannot breathe without your care …”

So I held onto her fingertips
From deep within my being
Knowing it was time to pull her
Up from an inner sorrow,
I was witnessing …

Struggling at first
because of the years
Of neglect of my inner beliefs
I discovered a voice to unravel
“The Me of Me …”

I had roared loudly as a mom
Filled with love, joy, and happiness
Proud of the honor to be chosen
So I became fearlessly
An advocate for those who needed “Me …”

My sanity I was gifted!
As their mom, I was bold
My Passion!
My Purpose!
Allowed me to unfold

With joy for the chores of my life
Stronger beyond even I knew,
I was able to handle all strife …

One may wonder of the time needed
To hug “Me” into becoming my Truth
A week …
A month …
A year …
For “Me” it seemed a lifetime
Of Journaling – Reading – Writing Poetry
By releasing my fears and finally
Allowing the tears!

Still, I subdued the real “Me of Me,”
Behind my Spirituality
Once again I silenced a part of my
Inner child’s laughter, joy, and happiness
Through this new sacred personality!

Today I believe as a spiritual being
I am here to experience my human creation
As I am,
The Divine Presence of God
In action
The “I” that “I AM,”
The “Me of Me.”
Finally …

Thankful!
Grateful!
Joyful!
For the lessons, I learned
Offers an acceptance for the
Sacrifices made,
By those who loved “Me,”
As I loved “them.”
Whether they be family
or friend.

I was aware of a vast resource
on the Ring of Keys!
The Discovery of my
Key of Freedom has
Opened the door
For me to experience more

Which then led “Me” to the
Key of Forgiveness!
To move forward on the path of my
Intended life experience
Once I embraced the Key of Forgiveness!
I experienced the
Key of Gratefulness!

Love…
Light…
Laughter…
Are the Keys to all spiritual passion,
And where I discovered my purpose,
The reason I was born!
The joy of being whole
Now living a large life
No longer being small

The memories of the “smallness,”
I achieved can be released
Today,
I know the path I traveled
Whether silent or not,
fueled my desires

My soul needed to feel nourished
and to be nurtured
Immediately!
So that I could spiritually divorce myself
from an unhealthy
Reality!

Still, I continued to struggle
With who I now was
To believe I could
Grow “Me” to be a better “Me,”
Filled with insight and a new reality!

It seems my belief of going within
For answers to my pain
Ignited a “Love of Self,”
I cherish, which erased
The belief I was insane…

Although I question if this has always been
“The Me of Me…”
Just silently waiting to claim “Me.”
As one who knows that everyone
Has the right to be free!

It is the core of my essence
I’ve connected with
joyfully…
Allowing my truth to unfold
courageously!

My soul is aware it is
nourished beyond and above
More than I could have ever imagined
Through the practice of
Prayer…
Meditation…
Intention…
And Love!

Pray. Meditate. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

Life is Constantly Changing

“The magic of water has been in my life for years now as I wake up every day to  behold the beautiful sight of Mother Nature…”-Linda Amato

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My Backyard View

As I sit here in my library and fill with a heart full of gratitude for the days that are moving me forward. I am blessed. My life is wondrous. I am connected to Spirit. This belief of mine although alternative and difficult for many to comprehend has been rooted out of the depth of my soul from many lifetimes, I believe. I can remember the day even at this moment when I wondered if there was ‘more?’ I felt there had to be more to this experience we all call life. It was then that I begged for guidance in 2003 which led me to today.

“If you can’t be in awe of Mother Nature, there’s something wrong with you.” -Alex Trebek

It seems I was never truly aware but I did know I was not alone so I just moved one step in front of the other being a good girl. Quiet and silent was my belief, after all “Silence is golden!” As a child I was stronger then my brother and mother. I could handle more at a young age. There was an essence within that told me to be kind, loving and helpful. Never ever was I to be confrontational. Why? I wonder today why I could not have the power of speech until I was fifty. My answer this day is because it served me well to be silent and allowed me to be awakened to my truth. I know this because I believe there is a reason for everything.

“The most important this is to enjoy your life – to be happy – it’s all that matters.” -Audrey Hepburn

IMG_0749Raised in a time of change I never chose to be a rebel or  hippie yet, I felt I was never in the box. I obeyed my parents, elders and everyone. I questioned if they were right in my head but I never questioned them. There was always that inner essence that guided me daily. Human behavior is something I delight in and since I began studying with Deborah King in 2012 I have learned the many reasons we as humans do what we do.

At my age today: as a daughter, wife, mother, and grandmother I realize today the importance of women in my life. I have collected a tribe of my own that I have fallen in love with and I believe it is my way of being of service to them by sharing all that I can that is of alternative belief.  To begin with there is no right and no wrong way of living YOUR life experience. How can there be such a belief. We are here because we choose to be here on this planet at this time. We are a combination of soul and human. Our soul part is love and our human part is ego. That is where the battle within begins.

“We do not remember days, we remember moments.” -Cesare Pavese

We choose which one we are going to nourish daily by our thoughts, words and actions. What do you believe today that is different from what you believed yesterday? Change is constant because there is no way we can stay exactly the same in our thoughts, words and actions unless we fuel a life dedicated to negativity, unhappiness, regret and anger as our path because of something that happened a long time ago to us. As beings of love and light it is very difficult to choose the path of the ego/human belief daily. It is frustrating to realize that being angry or unhappy is not our nature. Especially since love seeps in when we bask in the beauty of Mother Nature, see or hold a baby, a sunset, smell a rose, fall in love, make love, celebrate a wedding, or birthday or just receive a compliment.

My question to you then is why not choose to nurture your soul/love part more often. When we choose to love we choose to transition and grow higher on the path of our journey. To choose love we must forgive ourselves and anything that happened by another to us in our past. We all have a choice to live as we choose to live so go for it! Just let go of anything that no longer serves you today.

“It is as grandmothers that our mothers come into the fullness of their grace. – Christopher Morley

I have chosen love and I believe that I have been able to nourish and nurture my soul daily. Is it easy, you ask? I can honestly say it is getting easier! The wonder of my life is the children that I share my life with from the ages of 8, 6, 4, 3, 2, and 1 month. It is magical to hold a baby in your arms and know she is heaven sent as an angel to share her love and light in the world. To talk to a child and listen, really listen to what scares him or what fills him with joy. To wrap your arms around a sleeping child and carry him into his home to rest all toasty and really heavy. To bathe a child and laugh as he laughs at the wonderment of water that fills him with delight. To watch the ballerina from within surface in her as she spins around or sings a song. Then there is the child that fills your heart to bursting for the simplicity of his outlook on life. Yes, I am truly blessed.

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I remember my children growing up and I always took time to listen to their stories and imagine today if you can, because they still reach out to me to tell me their stories. As a mother I learned the greatest of lessons from my mom to love unconditionally all, especially the children. As I sit here and type I wonder what will be because my grand babies are coming over to go in the pool and I am ready to play and swim with them because they are pure beings of love and light still and I know it. Yet, I also notice the changes that are screaming to be let free by them to be able to just be. Many children today are new souls and are clueless as to how to live in our world They need us as old souls to teach them. What better way to teach them then to love them unconditionally, hear them and explain life to them.

“A house needs a grandma in it.” -Louise May Alcott

I’m amazed at the love that fills my heart for these grand babies that are being raised by my children. I reflect back on my days of being their mom and truly can write I don’t know how I did it, except for the one fact that I loved every moment. I enjoyed being a mom and all it entailed! I live in a very large home that most days now is quiet. There is no more laughter, crying, yelling or playing. Yet in my minds eyes I can almost see them all at the dinner table. Having dinner when they were older was my favorite time as we sat for hours discussing their day. Today I believe I raised four amazing children because I simply took the time to really hear what they had to say. Now the voices of six grand babies fills my home when they visit and sadly, I know the silence will return when they leave. The beauty of my life is that I enjoy everyday just looking outside my kitchen to the love of Mother Nature that has comforted me all these years.

Meditate. Pray. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

http://www.DeborahKing.com

What a Great Ride it Has Been

             “In youth we learn; in age we understand.” – Marie Ebner-Eschenbach

This morning I opened my eyes and thought of the amazing ride I have been on. I sat up in bed and fell into my morning ritual; I meditated, prayed and contemplated on being sixty-five years old. I’m amazed by this lifetime I have journeyed. My personal ride began with what I labeled as a child of this inner feeling I called, “the blues!” Today I imagine it was just fear as a child that confused me. Being scared, afraid or terrified at a young age was the norm such a long time ago. Still the feelings sit deep within my heart even today. Tears can overflow at the inner conflict for my inner child of yesterday. There was a time I buried her deeply only to discover I could not breathe without her. I realize today that fifteen years ago I embraced her holding on to my eyelids and offered her love. It was time for her to resurface and know her truth. We began a new ride. The memories of my youth are filled with drinking fighting and abusive behavior between my dad and mom. Fear filled our home only because Friday nights dad came home drunk. Mom became embarrassed and totally afraid of him!


“You must learn to make your whole world your school.” -Martin H. Fischer

I know that I am not the only woman to have grown up in a house with an alcoholic/manic-depressant or fearful/critical parent. In fact, I realize as a child I had no understanding of these types of labels. I did not know the ride would take me through abandonment, abuse, fear, pain, tears, death and lies over and over again. Death is a part of life but sudden unexpected deaths are terrifying at any age. My only brother to die by a drunk driver, my oldest nephew to be murdered then my beloved dad to  die of lung cancer. I know that at times there was great laughter and love going up but coming down that roller coaster  could almost make me topple over and crash when the fears arose.

 “Why be anything other than good? Why do anything other than love!” –Johnathan Dahl

 However, here I sit as a whole woman, loved, fulfilled, happy and amazed with gratitude for the experiences of my lifetime. I live a good life! I admit I struggle still today when those I love are unkind, critical or judgmental of one another. It is those times that my inner child comforts me with a memory of me climbing a tree at McCarren Park, swimming at Coney Island or just drinking Mountain Dew and eating pretzels on the stoop. It was the simplicity of yesterday that encourages me to love unconditional. I’m thrilled with the joyous memories of my childhood today because those were the moments that pushed me forward. The fearful dark memories are drifting further and further away from my inner sight.

            “If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree.” – Jim Rohn

I blame no one for the ride I chose to take because at this time in my life I believe I am an amazing  wife, mother and grandmother. How did I get to this time in my life believing that my life is wonderful? It always comes back to the simple parts of the ride I believe. When my dad was dying he looked at me and said, “I had a wonderful life so don’t cry for me because you are gong to die one day too!” That was in 1998 and finally I get it!

At forty years old he attempted suicide and lived the next thirty years in and out of mental institutions supported and loved by me and my husband for anything he needed. Weekly visits were the norm when he was not hospitalized but living in an adult home facility and happy no matter what. A true loved of Mother Nature he taught me to respect her as well. With forgiveness, acceptance, kindness, unconditional love, and not taking anything personal I made these beliefs my tools. Meditation, prayer and writing in my journal are my supplements to the ride. Knowing I am connected and blessed are my gifts today.


  “Life shrinks or expands in proportion to ones courage.” – Anais Nin

There will always be ups and downs because there is so much to learn in the greatest of classes in life called relationships. To love, hate, fear, and anger are the cornerstones of all relationships until we end any form of confrontation, control, and criticism. There came a time on my journey when the abandonment issues of my mom settled deep within to thug at my heart. After repeated abandonment episodes like her moving to Puerto Rico because her son had died and there was no reason for her to stay in New York I would cringe at her words for a very long time. It was my dad who told me she was not a smart woman and to forgive her. Today I know I am the person I am because of her and that I would not have been able to know my gifts and talents if she remained by my side. Could this have been a contract we agreed on prior to birth?

When I discovered what an amazing ride I have experienced because of the choices and changes I made, I filled with a deep sense of gratitude. At this age I know when I sit and color with gel pens for an hour or so my inner child is happy. If I choose to take a walk, read a good book or practice some yoga poses I have reconnected with the simplicity of life that fills me with joy. When I share my wisdom with others through counseling, workshops, blogging and talking I am being of service. The wisdom we all possess rests deep within and needs to be connected to so that peace can be part of the ride. The time will come when everyone gets the chance to get off their amazing roller coaster ride and live a loving, peaceful existence. Know it is possible as I do! When you exit you will breathe a feeling of contentment and smile as you remark, “what a great ride it has been!”

Meditate! Pray! Journal!

http://www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES IN LOVE…

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Why do we not choose to love in all situations?

As a woman, wife, mother and grandmother I find myself dealing with many different types of personalities that are generated by fear. I believe that we come into this world as loving beings of spirit and our purpose here is to love unconditionally. However, many believe in conditional love which is painful to behold as a child growing up. The essence of conditional love is, “if you do not do what I say, you will be punished.” Growing up in a home of fear myself because of a parent with the addiction of alcoholism I learned to be afraid. I learned to not know who I was or how to act or speak. It was this belief that allowed anger to settle into the core of my being. All I wanted to be was a child but responsibilities were forced on me at a very young age that I did not understand how to react to. A memory at 5 years of age haunts me to the point that at that moment there was no one to protect me but myself. I cringe that at such a young age I chose such a drastic defense pattern.

How does one manage  to protect themself in fearful situations?

There are characterologies or what I have learned to also be called defense patterns that we develop at a young age which are not our truth but which we pick to protect ourselves. There are only five defense patterns that we choose at one time or another because of the fears of our childhood.

Schizoid is the first defense pattern which developes before or after birth because of the trauma of  a hostile mother. This person evokes intellectualization. The eyes are vacant fixed and scared. The person is hyperactive and ungrounded. The defense action is to leave the body out of the top of their head when triggered as an adult today. The physical build is elongation with right/left imbalances because they are always twisted out of their body. The style of communication is in absolutes. There is a double bind for they believe, “To exist means to die.”  This defense pattern demands the right to be and to exist. A schizoid’s mask statement is, “I’ll reject you before you reject me!”To set boundaries are required of this person today.

Oral … developes during babyhood feeding because of the trauma of abandonment.  This person evokes mothering. The eyes are pleading like a puppy dog. This person is hypoactive with low energy. The physical build is thin with a collapsed chest. The style of communication is to ask questions. The double bind for this type of person is, “If I ask, it’s not love; if I don’t ask, I won’t get it.” This defense pattern demands the right to be nurtured and fulfilled.  An Oral’s mask statement is, “I don’t need you!” This type of person needs to own their needs and stand on their own two feet.

Psychopath .. developes in early childhood because of the trauma of seduction and betrayal by  a parent’s untruthfulness. This person evokes submission. Their eyes are compelling. Hyperactivity followed by collapse is the energy of this defense pattern.An inflated chest which makes this person top heavy is a sign of the psychopath. Their choice in communication is to dictate to others. Their double bind is, “Kill or be killed.” This defense pattern demands to be supported and encouraged. The psychopath’s mask statement is, “I’m right; you’re wrong!” This type of person needs to trust.

Masochist … Autonomy stage of growth is when this defense pattern developes because the child is controlled, with forced feeding and evacuation. This person evokes teasing. The eyes are suffering/confused. The physical build is that the head is forward and heavy. The energy level is hypoactive (internalized energy). Whining disgust is how they communicate. The double bind is, “If I get angry, I’ll be humiliated; if I don’t, I’ll be humiliated.” This defense pattern demands to be independent. The masochist’s mask statement is, “I’ll kill (hurt) myself before you do!”It is their need to be assertive, free, and open to spiritual connections.

Rigid … This defense begins in puberty because of sexual denial and betrayal of the heart. This person evokes competition. Sparkling, bright and present are their eyes.Their energy is high and hyperactive.  The physical build is a rigid back and their pelvis is tipped back. The choice of communication is as a qualifier. “Either choice is wrong,” is their double bind. This defense pattern demands the right to have feelings (love/sex). The Rigid’s mask statement is, “Yes, but…” Interestingly it is their need to connect the heart to the genitals.

SexualitySchizoid/Sex to feel life force, fantasy. Oral/Sex for closeness and contact. Psychopath/Hostile,fragile,homosexual, fantasy. Masochicst/Impotence, strong interest in Pornography. Rigid/Sex with contempt.

The defensive action of these defense patterns are: Schizoid/leaves the body. Oral/life sucks. Psychopath/controls others. Masochist/demands and resists at same time. Rigid/acts appropriately, rather than authentically.

The results of their defensive action are: Schizoid/weaker body. Oral/inability to metabolize own energy. Psychopath/aggression and betrayal/drawn to self. Masochist/dependence; inability to differentiate between self and others. Rigid/inability to experience self; world is false.

The main issue of these defense patterns are: Schizoid/existential terror. Oral/Nurturance. Psychopath/betrayal. Masochist/invasion and theft. Rigid/authenticity, denial of real self.

The fears are: Schizoid/living in human body as an individual. Oral/not enough of anything. Psychopath/letting go and trusting. Masochist/being controlled; loss of self. Rigid/imperfection.

What they have experienced: Schizoid/direct aggression. Oral/lack of nurturance; abandonment. Pschopath/was used and betrayed. Masochist/invaded;humiliated. Rigid/denial of psychological and spiritual reality.

All of these defense patterns are not their truth. This was a means of protecting themself from an adult when young. Today these patterns rise as a means of defense when they are triggered by anothers words or actions. It is a cellular memory that triggers them into their defense. At some point, the child experienced trauma severe enough to begin needing to  block their emotions and instead use a defense pattern for dealing with the world.

Personally, I am aware in refletion that I was a psychopathic mother and I would like to apologize to my children because I had to have scared them at times. Please forgive me because I was most likely  more afraid than you.

My teacher Deborah King has opened my mind and heart to be accepting of others and to know that how they think, speak and act is a defense when triggered. To not criticize or judge someone but to look for the light within which is their truth. In learning to love oneself opens the door to love others as they are. No one knows how anyone was raised and the pain or fear they experienced. Born as spiritual beings of love and light we must learn from these lessons we chose to experience and educate ourselves on a spiritual path of healing.

Today I feel blessed to be on this amazing journey we call life. I know that there is a reason for everything and that anything is possible. I am in the process of peeling away the onion of my life, layer by layer and releasing the repressed fear, greed, lies, hatred, pride and anger that no longer serves me.  All that a child at any age really needs is to know they are loved and protected by their parent. Being a parent is a powerful responsibility!

I would like to forgive my mom for I am positive today that she did the best she could because of the childhood she experienced. She was an extremely fearful woman. I am clueless to how she was raised  but she has been one of my greatest teachers and for that I am grateful.

Who do you think you are?

The source of the above information is from my studies with Deborah King and she credits this information from Light Emerging by Barbara Ann Brennan.

MEDITATE. PRAY. JOURNAL

www.LindaAmato.com

www.DeborahKing.com

LA Believes in LOVE

Here I was in 2003 affirming a new life for myself. Not that my life needed to be different but more like I needed to change my beliefs and step into a new beginning for me. When I heard the call of my soul I awakened to a world that was called by many new age. An interesting term when the truth is that this world that opened for me felt like it was part of my existence. I felt like I was home as I traveled the many avenues offered. In November of this year I experienced a Spiritual Day Spa which was amazing. It was at this spa that I met my mentor and studied with her for one year. She also was a Reiki Master Teacher and Certified Holistic Health Counselor. When the student is ready the teacher will come is how the saying goes. It seemed that I was ready.

Reiki is a 100 year old healing  modality where the practitioner uses hand positions over the chakras. The chakras are both connected to the physical organs in our body and the different layers of the aura. Chakra is a Sanskrit word and means “wheel.” A chakra will spin in relation to the energy level of your system. These chakras exist within us all. In the same way that we have a physical body we also have a subtle body. There are seven chakras that start at (1) the base of our spine (2) going up the body to the sacral (3) then our solar plexus (4) to the heart (5), throat (6), brow or third eye (7) the crown.  Every chakra has a corresponding organ in our physical system. I always refer to the chakras as the blueprint to our soul. As I discovered a new way of connecting to myself and by receiving Reiki, a shift from the depths of my soul guided me forward.

As I recall these years there were so many teachers that appeared for me in the form of books as I love to read. I actually have a library in my home. My dream ever since I could read and write was to be an author. My entire life I loved the action of taking a pen to paper and putting my thoughts and feelings into a journal. I explored poetry as a form of therapy when I was a young mother.

Here I was with my mentor who also taught me Reiki and led me to the Institute of Integrative Nutrition in NYC. The year was 2004 and in April, I discovered Caroline Myss and read her book Sacred Contracts. I have to take a second to inform you my reader that not only did I read many of these teachers books but I also traveled to their workshops. I laugh as I remember my fears as a Long Island mom traveling into New York City. However, the call of my soul drove me to take one step in front of the other and move forward at my pace.

Remember those little fingertips holding on for dear life when I looked into the mirror, well my inner child was starting to loosen up and let go. She was somehow happier as I traveled this path of my truth. I developed a need to walk at the beach, skip and sing with her. I fed her and she nourished my soul as we reconnected. There was no looking back but I will admit there was fear that I was going somewhere I knew nothing about haunted me. I was a wife and mother and that I knew how to do very well so I allowed that change is growth and I was doing something to create a better me, a wiser me and developing a spirituality that I had forgotten was mine.

Caroline Myss explains in her book Sacred Contracts how you can identify your particular spiritual energies, or archetypes – the gatekeepers of your higher purpose – and use them to help you find out what you are here on earth to learn and whom you are meant to meet. Exploring your Sacred Contract will shine a light on the purpose and meaning of your life. You are meant to do certain tasks, you are meant to have certain relationships.

By the time I was reading this book I had become a Reiki Master myself. Not only does Caroline Myss write of our contracts but she also  writes the following about our chakras.

The  system of energy centers known as the chakras  defines and supports our spiritual life much the way the spinal column – along which they are traditionally located – supports our physical body. Like the stages of a Contract, they too follow a progression that reflects our spiritual development from childhood through maturity. But in a literal sense, the chakras are also connected to the everyday function of our bodies and minds. They regulate everything from our survival instinct, sex drive, and self-esteem to our emotions, intellect, will and spiritual aspirations. A knowledge of how they function and how they help you to function is essential to a complete understanding of your Sacred Contract.

It is the reaction to our life situations I have learned that are capable of filling each and everyone of us with fear or love. My journey to live my truth has been an experience for me to look into all that is possible in life. As I pray I know I am creating a connection to a force that is beyond my wildest imagination to a power within. Releasing my thoughts in a journal is a form of therapy that clears my mind and soul. Meditation takes me into the vast depth within that waits to calm, center and enlighten me.

As I share my story and the  journey next and how I became a true believer in the unknown I hope my light shines on you.

Pray. Mediate. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

 

 

LA Believes in Love

As I continue writing on the shift of transformation that I was led to I feel blessed to share my journey. After traveling a life experience of loving unconditionally I found that I needed more in life. It was a time when my soul cried out to me. I was led to what I call Part “B” of my journey. A book opened my heart to experience a path that is believable but alternative for many. Yet, in my heart I ached to return to this part of myself.

I did not tread lightly on this new adventure as I flew forward anxious at times and fearful but within I knew I had to move forward. I ask myself always can one book simply allow me to believe as I do today and I must answer it was this one step that led  me to walk many steps.

This book that I speak of is by Louis L. Hay and I discovered it in a little quaint bookstore in Woodstock New York. In reading You Can Heal Your Life, I discovered her Philosophy which I embraced with open arms as well as the ability of affirmations to inspire me daily.

Louise L. Hay writes:

We are responsible for all of our experiences. Every thought we think is creating our future. The point of power is always in the present moment. Everyone suffers from self-hatred and guilt. The bottom line for everyone is, “I’m not good enough.” It’s only a thought and a thought can be changed. We create every so-called illness in our body. Resentment, criticism and guilt are the most damaging patterns. Releasing resentment will dissolve even cancer. We must release the past and forgive everyone. We must be willing to begin to learn to love ourselves. Self-approval and self-acceptance in the now are the keys to positive change. When we really love ourselves, everything in our life works.

I discovered my inner child hanging tightly on to the lids of my eyes when I looked within. I felt her sadness and despair to survive. Clueless to how my childhood, marriage and life experiences had filled a part of me with sorrow I fell in love with her and in doing so, I began to love me just as I was.

After reading this book I wrote affirmations for twenty-one days for twenty-one times until my thought process changed. I still say the same affirmations today that I began with in 2003 daily.

I trust the process of life to bring only good to me. I am safe. All is well. I am as God created me, a spiritual being of love and light. I only create peaceful experiences because I love myself. I am healthy, happy and whole body, mind and soul. There is time and space for everything.

This 246 page book is what enlightened me to open my heart and believe in me. I had many years of despair, depression and doubt in who I was due to the journey. Death has the way of manifesting a desire to know and understand reasons why everything happens. Abuse makes us look within to wonder why we are treated unkindly. Abandonment makes us wonder why we are not loved. Life has this way of allowing us to experience different emotions and fear no matter who we are. I credit this book to open wide the window of my soul to finally be nourished.

There are many books, classes and workshops I have enjoyed and I look forward to sharing with you the power and process of positive thought, word and action. My teachers have been many and I hope you enjoy the ride with me.

Pray. Meditate. Journal

www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES IN LOVE

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The purpose of my existence has been to love and be loved. I never questioned any other way of being. I simply knew to love. It mattered not the situation or how I was treated my choice was to love. At times when fear crept into my world I wrote poetry or took to my journal to make sense of others in my life being unkind. When I became a mother thirty-eight years ago the meaning of my being here was confirmed. To nurture and nourish with unconditional love was the key that unlocked the despair from yesterday.

There was a part of me that understood the natural essence of life and how to provide with my body through natural childbirth and breast feeding a cord that would sustain us both. This wonder in my first son was a miracle with my husband that we would create a total of four times. The memories I have stored away that I treasure from the very moment I met these babies has sustained me to know my purpose. I believe that they set the stage for what I do today in more ways than one can imagine. As a single mom my children kept me sane. I realized early that I never owned them and that I was simply the means of their existence and foundation.

I deeply loved the responsibilities that came with this new title I proudly wore that I was chosen to be the mother of Tory, Tina, Nicholas and Jessica. Dinner time was family time where we gathered together to share our day and to laugh. You may wonder if there was conflict, rebellion and disagreement between these siblings and society. I fool you not and share that we existed as a family bonded by a mother that saw no wrong in her children. Boundaries were a key ingredient in their world as they grew up. Do not think that they did not call to my attention the judgmental and critical attitude of their teachers. Still, I stood firm in my belief in my children no matter what.

Children learn by love and support which they received abundantly. Who they have grown to be in essence as husband, father, wife and mother is critical to how they were raised. The two youngest ones who are not married yet still have time to choose how they will approach the world of being a spouse or parent.

What they have accomplished today is their freedom to live in a world where many have fallen victim to drugs. Is this the reality of a society that has fallen victim to substances, due to the fact of pain, choice or a prearranged contract? Why does one choose to be addicted and another not? Only God knows the answer to that.

In reality, I am a child of an alcoholic but I chose not to be one. Is there a lesson here that I simply learned that I grasped at a young age? Can it be that what I was witness to was part of the plan? As we are all children at one time raised by our parents very early on, I wonder who is the teacher and who is the student?

Today as I blog my baby has turned thirty years old. I am amazed at how time is the one thing we can not stop or change or return to in our reality of life. Time does not wait for anyone. Children will grow up with or without love I imagine. Although I do believe as a mom that my greatest and only reason for being is to love these children under all circumstances.

Who I am today on this path that I travel is because of them, my husband and my parents. Many have travelled along with me and some have stayed while others ventured away. Know that we are all here to light the way for another with love.

Transformation is next…

Pray. Meditate. Journal.
www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES IN LOVE

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The innocence of my life was that I loved. The path of my life has led me on a journey that I never questioned or wondered about. Placing one step in front of the other I walked forward trusting and believing in my destiny. I imagine at times that fear gripped me and tried to delay that which I needed to learn by the power of  my ego to fill my head because of the situation of my home life. The journey has a way of allowing us to stumble at times and pick ourselves up and move forward on this path we call life.

Raised in to believe in God, I went to Catholic school where real nuns in black dresses and huge rosary beads put fear and belief in sin in everyone. That I loved was simply my foundation of being taught to be a good girl. The rituals of my religion I embraced with open arms. Prayer, church and confession were weekly if not sometimes daily. Somehow when I was younger the air on Sunday was different to me. The sounds and people on a Sunday were different, as well.  I cannot explain it but Sunday was a holy day and a family day. The silence in the air I imagine today was because no one worked and all the stores were closed. It was peaceful to go to the Avenue and find that every store was closed. This was a time when there were no malls imagine that! My dad would go to the bakery and after church we had cheese Danishes and apple turnovers. When I was older and no longer in Catholic school I skipped church and walked the Avenue. Once in high school there was no one to answer to and the taste of freedom too great. Needless to say, I held fast to my prayers but the rituals of my childhood slipped away. I was too busy now.

What does the word love really mean? Love in the dictionary states a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child or friend. Such innocence of affection led me to marry my childhood boyfriend and begin one amazing ride. We grew up during these past forty-four years together in our marriage. We truly lived an existence that was separate at times and filled with emotion at others. I was taught by my parents as he was taught by his about how to be in a relationship. I cannot speak for his childhood because I was not living in his home. Mine although briefly described prior to this page, I saw a father who cherished his wife although he scared her to death because of his addictions. It was this witnessing of separation between them as my brother and I went with my dad everywhere and during the last thirty years of his life it was I who spent time with him and cherished him. My mom’s detachment due to fear of him and me allowed her to favor my brother so the lesson I learned was to favor no one.  My husband and I had created a separate existence through the years while raising four children. I find this interesting to realize today because our roles somehow reflected a part of our own upbringing.

Blessed to be a stay at home mom it was my husband who has provided everything for our family. His drive and desires enabled us to live a life filled with abundance. A man of many talents he is a builder of homes today because he started his journey in construction but at one time he owned and ran two restaurants, a resale automobile business and a record label, as well as, being a manager for our daughter’s singing career.

Still I wonder always when did the innocence leave. Is it simply part of living at this time on planet earth that somehow, somewhere more became a requirement to exist. Why did we choose to go further than our parents in every way? Was it offered to us because of our education, beliefs or simply the fact that change and growth is part of the plan for everyone. An example I think of was that I grew up without a car. At one time we had seven cars in our home. Another would be; I grew up with a telephone only in the kitchen. Our house had one in every bedroom and there were five, living room and even in our master bathroom which brought it to a total of eight. Is this all considered progress, want or necessity.

Now that we are alone in our large house we have only one television in the living room and we have downsized to five telephones and three cars. My life is abundant and yes I am grateful beyond words for the ride i have been allowed to experience. My yesterdays have taken me to a place of deep understanding that there is a reason for everything and there are no mistakes ever in life.

To come … the children!

Pray. Meditate. Journal

www.LindaAmato.com

LA Believes in Loving Life

Life is a daily existence filled with joy, happiness and relationships. Sometimes sadness, anger and fear stems from the relationships in our life today as well as yesterday. We are a society stressed out by the lives we have manifested. Our fears and loves stem from that which happened in our past. Many of us have been victims of mental or physical abuse at one time. We have struggled with abandonment, depression and deep despair. The variety of thoughts that no longer serve us originated in our childhood. Our inner child needs to be comforted, held close and feel loved.

We choose many paths in life on this amazing journey. Still the echoes of yesterday get triggered by others. It is a recurring stress factor in most lives. As we mature into the adults we are destined to be, we look to heal ourselves. There are many self-help books, prayers, meditations, workshops, retreats and mentors that we seek out. The many different avenues we try only lead us to the next one. Personally, I pray, meditate, journal, read spiritual books, use aromatherapy and music daily. In the past I have been to workshops and retreats and have held my own. In learning it is best to share with others. I consider myself a ‘way-shower.’  I have been inspired this past year to embrace adult coloring. In doing so, I have held two adult coloring workshops as well. 

It becomes a healing and release for our inner child when we delve calming into the page and color. The simplicity of its memory hugs us from deep within as we forget the world. The action of colored pencil or gel pen stroking the page is a distant memory of our youth. A time in our lives of just being one with an action that was ours and ours alone. The beauty we witnessed as we colored a flower, dog, cat, tree or house. As a child we were able to escape into a world of make believe as we connected to the page we colored. 

The benefits of coloring as an adult today is the deep connection to your inner child, it’s meditative, an act of creativity, it will allow you to de-stress and there is a benefit within the action of hand-eye coordination. I find it to be relaxing, fun and my greatest benefit is the silence allows me to join with Spirit. May you take one giant step forward on your path and begin a spiritual practice of coloring daily for at least 20 minutes! 

You need to find what works best for you as you enter the world of coloring today as an adult. The morning may be a time of beginning your day by choosing a picture that will set the tone for your day of calmness and being mindful.  Try to end your day coloring by unwinding  in a relaxed emotional state of mind as you self-soothe. 

Pray. Meditate. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

LA Believes in Loving Life

 My journey this lifetime has been one amazing ride. At times I feel I don’t know myself or that I question how I believe as I do. I feel filled with a vast supply of love which can only be expressed by me as unconditional. My past has struggled, stumbled and attacked me in many ways however, today I know that which filled me with despair was a lesson to learn from.

As an avid reader my entire life I realize every book I have ever read had its purpose on my journey. My path  is scattered with books  from biographies, religions, self-help, fiction and non-fiction but I treasure the stories on spirituality today more than any other. These are the books that whisper to me during the day, at night and in my dreams. I have learned to heal the wounded inner child of my past through these books. 

Living Beyond The Five Senses is such a book that needs to be read by anyone who wants to know their path to becoming the spiritual being you were born to remember. Know that there is a reason for everything and that there are no accidents. Teresa L. DeCicco writes, “the simple act of noticing one’s own thoughts is a big step toward transforming spiritually.” I give this book 5stars. 

Pray. Meditate. Journal.

www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES …

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The Fears of Life Eventually Lead us to our Path, Passion and Purpose….

 

I believe with my entire self that anything is possible. I believe in love and kindness for all. I believe I have loved deeply and will always love deeply. It is the part of me that best describes who IAM! There was a time though that I feared life. Why? In retrospect I was lost and scared. I needed to believe first in who I AM. I created a pattern of letting my own self, my truth disappear and be taken from me. Strange words to write I imagine for others to read and yet it is the essence of life one needs to learn to see the beauty of which one can be in life. I have learned that we are all beautiful in our own way. We just glow brighter when we realize our own beauty comes from within. To let another rob us of who we are is a lesson to accomplish in returning to oneself, to simply remember our truth. This pattern we create to survive is our shield, mask or simply not who we believe we are allowed to be because of fear that has been gifted to us by our parents, spouses or society.

The path of life is to love the life you have chosen. To develop a trust that there is a process to all of life and that everything happens for a reason. Those who dare to believe otherwise refuse to learn about themselves. Clearly, I see the pain in life that we ourselves need to create due to the basic belief we choose when we choose fear. Once love replaces fear the pain will be no more. We all at one time need to grow our thoughts, words and actions with a belief that is positive by planting one seed at a time. A wholeness will then develop to set one apart. As we realize there is a part of us that is our spiritual self, we will then discover that these inner parts are deep and profound, as well as, perfect.

We create barriers in our own lives! Who or what is this barrier? It has to be an emotional state one gets into which is not contributing to who one really is. As the carrier of our own emotions we need to release the ideas, thoughts and feelings of yesterdays relationship with life that have become habits today. In doing so, a new beginning will unfold.

There is a definite oneness to life – a unity that connects us all yet we are individual with our own creativity to allow one to progress in life to complete self-harmony. We will then become balanced and have responsibilities through the service of this creativity to fulfill a life daily with this inner wisdom which is our self-harmony. Individually each one of us needs to attain this for ourselves. The barrier created of emotional attachment will be released then forever. The beauty of life is when we choose not to allow despair into  our being and to stop the growth of it to become a strength that is unacceptable. We must grow beyond what we ourselves can imagine.

There comes a time when we desire to travel alone in life without the strength of another. Why? We need to find the strength we possess within! When one flies to the highest change one can experience the discovery of who they can be will be waiting to complete them. This release of emotional attachment to our past is the grandest of complete growth and our independence. We all have the right to travel this journey of knowledge that we crave about who we are and who we can be.

There will then be a positive sight  to cling to and the path will be cleared of the debris of fear that had been gifted from one to another. The  body, mind and soul creates and craves to release the negativity of life that surrounds everyone. This is the needed escape to cleanse the thoughts of yesterday once and for all. The routine of the vicious cycle of life one is accustomed to will then end quite quickly. We cannot stop the fears of yesterday by the thoughts of trying to reason or ask why. That is not up to us IAM told. Embrace the lessons learned and leave the rest.

It is a bit difficult to be able to stand up and believe in oneself. Yet, it is needed and the only way is to follow the inner ache of the heart for more. The truth of who anyone can be is this accomplishment. We are never taught to love ourselves first but to do for others especially as women. It is expected that women must sacrifice their lives for those they love. Men also have the burden of being strong, successful, responsible and insightful to the needs of the women they love. Whether we are woman or man fear is of the ego. Love erases the fears of yesterday and connects one to God. Anyone can get a chance to live a life that can fulfill their desired dreams at any age. A miracle of insight and knowledge, of all one can desire, dream and imagine starts by the simple act of loving oneself.

One may wonder how one begins to love oneself and reach as deep within as they can to find their path, passion, and purpose – their power. It is not easy to relive the past looking for answers to all the questions that start with why! Know that there is a road to travel that is waiting for you. Leave the past where it belongs in the past and become aware of your present thoughts, words and actions. The steps can be many; from diet, to exercise, affirmations, Reiki, acupuncture, massage, meditation, prayer, energy healing and the inner work of taking pen to paper is the greatest therapy I have ever experienced to release all that no longer serves me today. My greatest moments in life have been when I connected to Mother Nature’s beauty; a walk at the beach, a walk around the block, sitting under the moon, swimming in water, even hugging a tree to ground myself to her and fill myself up with her strength. We are one as we all spend time with her daily in any form that we travel. Mother Earth connects us and supports us in all that we choose to be.

Pray, Meditate, Journal

www.LindaAmato.com

 

LA BELIEVES …

Wounds of the Inner Child …

 

The journey of discovery is becoming a Being of Love at some point in life. We become whole with passion and purpose. No fear, no addictions, no pain, no anger … Just love, contentment, health and joy! We are born as Love but life detours us with the lessons we come to learn and grow from. One can never go wrong if they always choose the path of loving oneself first, forgiving the fearful, sharing by being of service, and saying ‘yes’ to another with a heart filled with love. I find that addictions of any kind is key to most fear and pain as a means of self healing but truly all that is accomplished is a temporary escape from the reality of life. One cannot be of right mind if they are not clear of mind. Addictions of any kind fog the mind, affect the body and create depression and distress.

Many of us believe we are victims by another’s projection unto us of their fears. When another is verbally abusive, angry, or hateful towards someone they claim to love they are deeply wounded. We have become a society that accepts pain and fear as the norm. I believe that an abuser’s inner child is screaming to be loved. We all have patterns we have created to help us get through the abuse when we were young. Even if the abuser was not aware of the fear and pain their actions created in the home because it was how they were raised. The child develops a defense, a way of surviving and learns the path of being one who abuses another as well. Unfortunately, we all learn everything that goes on in a relationship from our parents. Whether it is a loving supportive household or an angry, abusive one we find a way as a young child to cope with it all. 

But what about the abused? How do they survive the mental exhaustion, the tearing open of their heart and the draining of their tears? They seem to accept they did something wrong, they are not loved, they are bad. Simply that they are to blame period. The confusion fills their mind until they either accept this is their destiny or they walk away just to survive.

Sadly, where there is love there is a way. Alternative belief is there for all to discover their strength. Look within by the act of prayer, meditation or taking a pen to paper and release the demons through the written word. If you have any kind of addiction get detoxed, get to a meeting, get to a group. Communication is key in all relationships with honesty and the desire to truly hear another. The man or woman that was raised in an abusive home must realize that they do not have to be like their parent. If they felt abused as a child then let it go through finding that which works for them. There are many avenues to take to become a better person than how you were raised to be. Acceptance and acknowledgement of being abused is first.

I believe we have an inner spark that ignites when it is triggered by a similar moment from our past. Abuse of any kind becomes a pattern deep within and gets handed down from generation to generation. Here are two words to help you heal … STOP IT!

When we share our life with someone we love deeply and children enter the relationship why would we want to create a fearful, unhappy, suffering life for them to witness is a question that needs to be answered by the abuser as well as the abused. The truth is that many of our relationships have been chosen prior to our birth and we are here to be teachers for one another. If there is an inner ache of any kind that fills you and leads you to any kind of addiction know that you are first and foremost abusing yourself. STOP IT!

Pray, Meditate, Journal

www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES …

My Inner Child

I wonder if at any given time during a persons life experience can the issues of their parents despair resurface?

Can abandonment be heredity?

Can anger be a seed planted to grow from generation to generation?

Aren’t we all One destined to experience a consciousness as One?

Does it not matter the love and support in ones life?

Why do most of us choose the fear and disappointment to cling to?

Why do we choose fear and not Love in most situations?

Why if fear which stems from the Ego and Love from God – do we gravitate towards fear?

What is this attachment we have to fear?

Do we gift our children on their journeys with our fears, unhealed wounds and personal negative beliefs for them to discover their truth?

Is it required that we heal first so they be healed?

What is God’s plan really for everyone?

I fell asleep the other night thinking of my mom. I miss her. I read a long time ago that you are never to go longer than two weeks from seeing your mom. I haven’t seen my mom in 2 years and 3 months. I have spoken to her on the telephone but she has no clue who IAM. Her choices in life have affected mine ever since I can remember. Sadly, there is nothing I can do now that she has dementia. Still I miss her. I miss a woman I never got to know!

It seems that the children of today are reminding me of my childhood at this time. While driving the other day, I imagined I saw her – my inner child jumping for joy and happy. However, I remember a time in the past when she hung on for dear life to survive the despair she suffered from. Today though she is healed from yesterday by the simple act of my acceptance of those I journey this life experience with. Throw in my belief that love is key and anything is possible.

The woman IAM today carries a sadness for the children of today. Many suffer from addictions to drug, alcohol and money. All suffer from the need to be acknowledged for who they are and all that they do. They lack the ability to just be themselves. They are not aware of their power, passion or purpose in life. We as a society are responsible for their belief in needing more, expecting more and at times demanding their right to have more which has wounded them to the depths of their soul. We as a society have forgotten that the best in life is the simplest. A sunrise, sunset, a walk, a hug, laughter or even just a kind word. To be giving without wanting anything in return.

Raised by parents that had very little schooling I have to write today that I had a good childhood. Especially, because back then I was not aware of the labels of society that characterize us into groups today. (My thoughts were that my daddy is acting funny, mommy says he is drunk and mommy and brother are afraid of him, so I have to take care of him.) Something so small separated our family in half. Divided we became – my father and me, my mom and brother. I found through my entire life I could talk to my dad about anything but not my mom. Why? I was told by my dad at ten years of age that my mom was afraid of me. (My ego puffed up that day!) Today it makes sense, as she feared him eventually she came to fear me. No one took the time to ask me if I was afraid though. I had to be afraid at one time because I was a small child. But in my heart I know I was a child who did as she was told period. It was how it was. Children listened to their parents. Catholic school also put the fear of God into me. I felt abandoned by my mom my entire life but did not know the word was abandonment more like I was unloved or unwanted. I had this inner ache that made me feel ‘blue’ at an early age.

I believe today that the hardest obstacles on everyones path is releasing the past no matter how terrible it was and moving away from the fears and pain. To accept and forgive whatever happened no matter what because it has happened and cannot be changed. To now be responsible for ourselves by forgiving what has filled us with despair yesterday. To know we are not to blame because another projected onto us their fears. We CAN choose everyday who we want to be, how we want to be and whether we want to be happy. Everyday is a new day, a beginning, a day away from yesterday that will manifest into tomorrow.

I know that IAM blessed today. I have changed from yesterday but still I travel a path IAM not sure of. IAM searching for what? I ask myself, when will this feeling end? I go back and forth in my mind…should I, could I,would I? What do I want? Who do I want to be? 

I believe IAM returning to a part of me from another life. At this age IAM traveling to discover the depths of my soul. At one time I thought I had arrived but this path is long and filled with lessons so I must simply take one day at a time. I surrender.

Pray, Meditate, Journal…

 Me and Mom…

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www.LindaAmato.com

LA Believes …

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My Inner Child …

Not all memories from growing up fill me with despair.

There was joy, I know there was. There had to be!

I smile as I sit here in a very small cottage on an island called Fire Island, New York. Paradise is the only word that comes to my mind! To get here you have to take a Ferry or come by boat. There are deer walking around  as the ocean roars for all to hear.  Most people ride bicycles to get from town to town and transport their stuff with wagons once they arrive. Owners with their dogs are everywhere. Hurricane Sandy did much damage and many ocean front homes have been washed away or destroyed by her fury.  Still, Fire Island is bursting with people who own homes, renters and day people who come for a day to bask in the sun.

In the past we came here by boat when our children were small and I dreamed of a house of my own one day in this magical land.  The Universe answered my pray and nine years ago my husband found what I named Heart Beat Haven! This small cottage is attached to a 5 bedroom house with two full baths, kitchen, living room, deck and an outdoor shower. This is the first summer the big house has not been rented. In the past we shared our ‘little cottage’ with our children, family and friends.  ‘Little cottage’ is little,  a room with a futon, sink, refrigerator and small back deck. A spiral staircase placed in the corner takes you upstairs to a bedroom and bathroom. Simply, Paradise!

I marvel at the memory of my childhood. A stoop to sit on or a walk around the block during the summer. On weekends maybe Coney Island beach or Rockaway beach by train.  The truth is I was happy with very little. There was a freedom in no school and a few chores to help my mom. Life was family, friends and simplicity. I was maybe 5 years old when we lived in Greenpoint, NY and watched fireworks on the roof top over Manhattan. We struggled with episodes of my dad drunk and my mother terrified of him but there were good times.  We had very little, not even a car but I never wanted for anything. Both my parents worked and today I know they did the best they could because look who I have become.

As a mom of 4 grown children and 4 grand babies I marvel the time we spend together from boating with my children every summer when they were small and now enjoying my grand babies as they jump for joy when a deer passes by them or comes by the deck to eat. My life has grown tremendously from taking care of a drunken dad, a fearful mom and a beaten brother. My husband has provided us with a life that is abundant by the grace of God.  We have shared our homes and our hearts as best we could.

IAM positive that if you asked my 4 grown children of their childhood you would get 4 totally different stories.  In my heart I know they were loved and given a life that I myself could never have imagined. May they take their childhood memories and treasure how we as their parents tried to give them all that we had never had! We love them as we were taught how to love. My husband has shared with our sons all that he loved; hunting, fishing, boating and building of homes. He has shared our daughters dreams and supported their choices.

We are such a different generation compared to today’s because they have so much more. Yet, I wonder about the lack of respect, the influence of society taking its toll on them. I pray their inner child is able to one day embrace the love, the joy, the laughter and take the lessons learned with an open heart. I believe the hardest lessons  in life is being true to oneself and to  release negativity and look for the positive in all situations. We are a society that have created this need to expect too much because we want so much more than our parents  ever had. There comes a time when we need to be grateful for the life we have, those we love and the air we breathe.

Pray, Meditate, Journal …

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LA BELIEVES …

LOVE BEINGS

Love is an emotion that fills us with joy. This joy is our happiness when we are filled with Love for another; our family, friends, job,  home, possessions. But, what about how we Love ourselves? We are Love Beings but yet we are miserable, sad and unhappy when we are not in a loving relationship, dislike our job and believe we need more stuff in our lives to make us happy. At times we feel overwhelmed by the life we have created! However, if we Love who we are, as we are, shouldn’t that be enough and everything else would fall into place? As a society we believe if we are not in a loving relationship to complete us something is missing in our lives. We seem to be under this impression that we are lonely and alone because we are not good enough or worthy enough. We lack something personally because we are missing the most important aspect in life which is a loving, supportive mate to share our existence with. We begin to crucify ourselves for not being good enough, thin enough, pretty enough or capable enough because there has to be something wrong with us. We are lonely! We are alone!

 

With this inner ache suffocating us we cannot comprehend life without another. Why?

I believe that we need to remember that each person in this society comes with their own agenda and their own childhood, as well as, their own personal contract with God! Love is this emotion that has to simply be the root of who one is. Many of us are wounded by our past, the words spoken to us from our parents or any negative, abusive behavior that we have endured. Yet, those who have abused us were taught themselves to abuse by how they were treated. We wear our abuse like a life preserver and choose to float through life and sometimes even sink to the deepest depth of despair. We are a society of generational beings who abuse ourselves because another has abused us. Words planted like seeds to grow float around our minds for years. The inner child screams at the self in fear, guilt, shame and grief because of the lies, illusions and attachment to a life empty of Love.

Everyone at one time or another is in a realtionship that fills them with happiness one moment and then disappointment. Many of us cry, laugh, support and encourage those we love but then feel we are not supported or encouraged in life. Life is about the cherished moments and difficult times. I believe that in any relationship there MUST be respect, for another’s space, one Must keep their individuality to know their truth. Everyone is good at something, do what you are good at and life will flow. Choose to be happy by connecting to your truth. The bottom line is that we are all doing the very best that we can and yet we attack one another for memories of moments from our past that ignite a pain. The triggers of the mind are the ego holding on to that which is done. You are not that child today and you can have your own voice now. We are all One and there is a consciousness to life that we all add to – choose your thoughts, words and actions wisely because they affect us all!

How can anyone Love another if they cannot Love themselves?

Who is not addicted to something?

Who has not been abused at one time in life?

Who has not been betrayed or themselves betrayed another?

Who has not despaired over another?

Who has not felt responsible for those they share their life with?

Who has not blamed themselves for everything wrong in their lives?

Who has not blamed another for everything wrong in their lives?

Who has not felt like a victim, slave or prostitute at one time?

I believe we do not lack anything and what is most important in life is to Love oneself, set free the belief that you are not complete so that you can surrender to your agenda. There are no mistakes, no accidents or sin in life. Everything happens for a reason. We create our tomorrow today by our thoughts, words and actions. Choose what you want to create carefully by releasing that which no longer serves you from your past. To be happy, joyful and whole one must be who they are! We are all Love Beings, believe this is so…

Pray, Meditate, Journal

www.LindaAmato.com

 

LA BELIEVES …

Forgiveness … but, why, when, how …

That small voice of our inner child is terrified and needs a hug, a kind word, acknowledgement and to know she is loved. What has scared her into being fearful is the screams, the anger, the shame and the dysfunctional pain of yesterday. Can she release the nightmares, the ache in her chest that fills her to hate another – a mother, father, brother, sister, uncle or friend. She carries the words, the punches, the screams and abuse today because she is trying to make sense of yesterday. Did she do something wrong? Was it her fault? Is she not allowed to feel loved? The answers to these questions haunt her mind and fill her dreams with a need to know. She is terrified of the answers as well because in her heart she believes she is not worthy of love today.

I love you as you are and I know you did nothing wrong. As a child how could you have done anything wrong. To release the fears of yesterday, the pain, and abuse forgiveness is key. Forgive yourself for you are an innocent. Forgive those who have harmed you for they had to be taught how to harm. We are all doing the best we can by those who have raised us as children yesterday. A child needs to know they are safe, are loved and that they have boundaries to adhere to. No one is allowed to hurt another with words, an object or their hands. Yet, we are a society filled with fear and pain by hateful words, flying objects and hands that abuse another by hitting or touching inappropriately.

Neglect to a child is no  boundaries to know what is allowed and what is not.

Neglect to a child is yelling, screaming and a parent who does not listen to them.

Neglect to a child is fighting between the parents.

Neglect to a child is not feeling safe in their own home.

Parents are powerful and the first law is respect for this child you have brought into the world. Children are born with unconditional love for their parents and when this love is not returned the inner child closes down and suffers a deep pain that they carry through life. How can a child forgive those who have created this inner fear, this feeling of being unloved, unwanted, not safe or just filled with guilt and shame. Pray, Meditate, Journal …

God is Love. Love is God. When we turn our belief to Him and trust that He has a plan for us we forgive the past, we forgive ourselves. There are only two aspects of life, the first is love which is God and the second is fear which is not God.

It takes more energy to  be angry then to laugh.

It takes more energy to hate then to love.

It takes more energy to stay mad then to forgive.

Pay attention to your emotions and shift them to be filled with love for yourself and others. The past can no longer hurt you because it is done. The present is your choice to live a life filled with joy by moving past the moment of pain which cannot be changed. We all have our stories but we are all given ‘free will’ by God so change the story to one of love for all no matter what has happened yesterday. You are responsible for your thoughts and once you change them to positive, loving, kind thoughts you will change yourself and those around you. May God bless you with inner peace, joy, happiness and love because you are a child of God and you are here to be like Him. Don’t let another dim your light even a little.

www.LindaAmato.com

LA Believes

It has come to my attention that we need to embrace the inner child, hold her/him gently in our arms and hug her/him close. Fears of a child haunt most of us daily and we become fearful and filled with guilt and shame that we did something wrong. Why would someone we love and trust treat us abusively in any way or form? It has to be something we did to be treated badly a child believes. We grow up not able to like who we are because we believe we are not worthy of being loved. We struggle with the words in our mind that were screamed at us yesterday. We feel fearful that another will attack us. We are ashamed of who we are because we know we are not worthy of being loved or happy because of how someone has touched us inappropriately.

My advice to you today, as an adult is to look at yourself in the mirror and say “I LOVE  YOU!” Look deeply within to your inner child and even if you cry let her know she is not alone and you are here for her. If you can love you as you are and forgive yesterday’s pain you will be one step closer to healing. Forgiveness of self is first and with that comes love of self. 

I imagine how scared a small child of any age must feel if they believe they are unloved. Parents, Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, and Teachers have this ability to take a child’s innocence away from them by their words and actions. But no matter what you were told or what was done to you … You have done nothing wrong! Abuse leaves its scars on your soul and fills your head with fear and pain. In dong so, we grow up fearful, unforgiving and filled with anxiety.

I believe personally that my mom was terrified of my dad when he was drunk or even sober because she never knew when the attack would begin at her. She knew he would never attack me and at nine years old she would wake me up to take care of him while she hid with my brother. She would cook him eggs and  somehow the frying pan, dishes and glasses would be thrown against the kitchen wall and she would run. She was clueless to how I felt or even if I was afraid. In its way her behavior made me stronger, this little girl knowing she could help her daddy and her mom could not. Today I can imagine that little girl at times depressed, filled with fear but knowing in my heart my dad loved me. However, I have struggled most of my life with knowing if my mom loved me. Just as she was afraid of my dad she was afraid of me, I believe.

Praying, my belief in God and the Angels, Journaling and meditating among my other rituals has offered me a safe haven for the little girl within to travel to. I have healed simply by the fact that I have looked into my eyes and I have seen the fingertips of my inner child holding on for her life about 25 years ago. I gathered her in my arms and gently I have told her how very special she is and that as a child of God’s she is unique and worthy of her life. This may seem unbelievable to many but all that inner child needs to know is that she is not alone, she is loved and she can be anything she wants to be no matter what another has done to her. In forgiveness of self we forgive another only because the past cannot be changed. I personally look back on my life growing up and savor the good times, the memories of going to Coney Island, a park, and walking around New York City with my dad. The difficult painful yesterday can no longer touch me because I have learned from the pain and fear. I have learned I am worthy of being a woman who is capable of being loved. I am happy, I am blessed. I am grateful for my mom today because I accept her with her fears and know they are hers and not mine.

It is difficult to live with our past at times but when we delve into knowing who we are today and release that which no longer serves us we can find love and joy daily by taking pen to paper and writing how we feel today and how we felt yesterday. No one can love you as much as you can love yourself. So go for it!

 

www.LindaAmato.com

LA BELIEVES …

Retreat … Ritual … Renew … Believe …

I am amazed daily when I hear of others needing to go on a Retreat to find themselves, to learn what their purpose in life is. I hear stories where everyone blames their parents. I see their pain in their eyes because they fear they are not worthy. Many of us have had abusive, alcoholic and detached fearful parents that have projected their fear unto us because they knew of no other way to be. Generational is the word as life is handed down by our parents from their parents and so forth. It takes three generations to break the pattern of depression, I have read. My story is no different or less painful and trust me I was a fearful child and woman until …

I went within to discover my inner child and love her as she is. I have promised her that I WILL protect her and love her forever. I apologized that I was overwhelmed by the circumstances of my childhood but now I know better.

Today at this very second in time, I believe my life is a RETREAT! I suddenly came to this realization one day when I sat at my kitchen table where I have been sitting for almost 26 years every morning to journal. I simply and honestly love the written word and the insight I receive from the books I read and from the words I journal. Of course, living on the water is an added bonus. I am blessed and grateful for all that this life experience has shared with me but to be able to know that ritual in my life is essential. My daily ritual is to first meditate, pray, journal and then go outside and thank Mother Nature for another day to be of service. I ask who can I say ‘yes’ to, today? I light candles, burn incense and read a spiritual book. I actually time my reading because I am capable of getting lost in a book. The other day I realized once again an ‘aha’ moment that God has given me the time to “play” with HIM! I cannot say which one of these rituals saved me from a life of despair and fear but the one that I have done my whole life is taking pen to paper. My journal was my friend and confidant – a form of therapy from the moment I learned to write. Stories, poems, letters have been a writing passion of mine.

I have learned through that which has guided me, which I imagine is my Spirit, to somehow renew myself. I am not the girl I was yesterday because I have embraced my past, my inner child and I have hugged her close to my heart through these rituals I needed to create to become who I am today. I did not question, I did not doubt everything but I moved forward looking for nothing more than inner peace. In doing so, I took the lessons I have come here to learn and I have said “YES, I am Woman! I have purpose! I am powerful! I am allowed to be ME!”

I travelled a path filled with this desire to know why others were not kind, respectful, loving or even just honest. I wanted to learn why people do the things they do to harm themselves and those they love? Why do parents not know how powerful they are and that they wound their children from an early age to become depressed which develops into being addicted, violent, angry and abusive?

As I sit at my laptop amazed at all that I have learned and that God has given me the ability to share with others that we are all His Children, we are not alone ever, and that only we can do the work through many different avenues to release that which no longer serves us.

For the past ten years I discovered a woman within that I never would have believed was there. I have been able to renew myself completely. Today, I proudly acknowledge I am the author of the book Making Believers: Connect to the Light within. I offer One-on-One Sessions for those who God sends to me to share information with. I am a student of Deborah King’s 21st Century Energy Medicine program. My passion is to learn, to know, to discover knowledge that I can share because it is the foundation of my being – it is what helps me to renew myself daily.  Like an onion I am still peeling the layers away. I started a Monthly Healing Circle of Love this year and I had my version of a Women’s Discovery Retreat through the Written Word in April.

I believe that anything is possible and that much can be learned from the women of yesterday who have taken the time to retreat through ritual to renew themselves as they believe who they are today when they embrace the good in their life and hug their inner child so that she finally feels worthy and safe.

www.LindaAmato.com

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